


my hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me, so won't you kill me?

by AmAgusSpas



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Bathrooms, Bathtubs, Body Worship, Consensual, Consensual Kink, Consensual Sex, Cuddling & Snuggling, Cute, Developing Relationship, Dirty Talk, Eventual Smut, F/F, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Hair Braiding, Hair Kink, Hair Washing, Hand & Finger Kink, Lesbian Sex, Lesbians in Space, Long Shot, Love Bites, Morning Cuddles, Muscles, Mutual Pining, Naked Cuddling, Neck Kissing, One Shot, Oral Sex, Pining, Post-Coital Cuddling, Power Play, Praise Kink, Shameless Smut, Singing, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Smut, Stolen Moments, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Towels, Useless Lesbians, Voice Kink, and top!yaz, but also power bottom!13, just to keep everyone happy, soft to smut, spot your fav!, too many kinks I can't list, top!13
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-27 04:26:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20942252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmAgusSpas/pseuds/AmAgusSpas
Summary: The Doctor has a simple request, on paper. All it takes is for Yaz to say yes. Except neither of them really plans what is going to happen next.





	my hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me, so won't you kill me?

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the thing I've been hyping up forever, finally!  
Buckle up, because this is one hell of a ride you're gonna be on.
> 
> Forever grateful for the brilliant @yasminkhxns who just solidly beta'd this for me.  
And yelled. A lot. Ilu Gee. Thanks bae.

It had been several hours since the Doctor had somehow managed to get herself and her fam back to the TARDIS. Several hours of drifting through the time vortex, catching a breather, pushing past the chaotic morning. She had sworn blind that the planet wasn’t in the throes of war for another hundred years or so, and yet she had still managed to get the wrong date. Cue endless hours of stopping an assassination, breaking a feud, forging peace, and leaving with another notch next to her name in the history books. At least she had had enough time to show her friends the crystal rainforests. Before they were swiftly set ablaze by laser fire. The day had been so chaotic, in fact, that everyone had disappeared pretty sharpish to unwind. But not the Doctor. No. She was stuck in a loop inside her own mind, constantly and torturously working over a thought in her mind. A thought that had been plaguing her for too long, and one that had just been reignited exponentially.

Something that was such a simple request should not have been a bother to her, and yet the Doctor found herself hesitating on numerous occasions. Whenever she vaguely plucked up the courage to ask what she wanted to ask, it would be dashed as soon as she entered the moment. There was never a right time to broach the subject. Frustration was building, mostly at herself. Why couldn’t she just ask? There was nothing wrong with what she wanted...right? Although, maybe there was, and her body was telling her it was a bad idea. Either way, she had to act, had to know for sure. It was in her inherently logical and curious nature, which could not be tamed even by self-doubt and uncertainty. After several minutes of pacing back and forth around the console room, to the chagrin of the TARDIS as she mumbled to herself about what to do and what not to do, she made a move. It was either that or more days of mindless anxiety.

Dragging footsteps lead her through the winding hallways. She stepped past the kitchen, avoided the library, walked right past her study. None of those were the places she needed to be, the place she wanted to be. Her body was travelling on autopilot as her mind continued to wage warfare with itself. If Ryan or Graham had heard or noticed her, they made no notion about it. She had no idea what she would tell them if she even came into contact. All she wanted to do was find one particular room. One person.

Soon enough, she found herself standing outside Yaz’s bedroom door, hand hovering over the door-handle. At this point, the Doctor was sure that the TARDIS was mocking her, judging by the lightly flickering lights down the hallway. She was always there, watching and waiting, either out of comfort or simply to watch her do something stupid. The Doctor was not sure what was the case this time, further increasing her frustrations over the situation she found herself in. As the flickering died down, she finally reached out to clutch painfully at the handle.

“Why is this so difficult? This really shouldn’t be difficult at all...”

Mumbling to herself again, rooted to the spot and unable to leave, the Doctor had nothing left to do but to take the plunge. She steadied her nerves, taking in a slow breath, before stepping forward and pushing. Opening the door into the comfortably sized room, the Doctor looked around for a moment before spotting Yaz. She had her back turned to the door, and she was rummaging through the top drawer of her chest of drawers. Eventually, with clothes in hand, she turned around and paused. If anything, she was puzzled by the sheepish looking Time Lord lingering around the side of her bed, twisting the heels of her boots into the carpet. She hadn’t seen her all evening.

“Doctor? Are you, uh...are you alright?”

Hiding her hands inside her coat pockets, the Doctor smiled towards Yaz, trying to hide whatever was currently on her mind with her usual cheery facade.

“Hiya Yaz. Everything’s fine, not a problem, absolutely hunky-dory.”

Yaz shifted her clothing from over her arms, bundling them underneath one as she placed a hand on her hip. As if picking up on the absurdity of the situation, the lights in her room began to flicker and a strange beep filled the room, the TARDIS piping up again. The Doctor lifted her head to the ceiling, shooting an accusatory glare at her ship and impatiently tapping her foot. Yaz was sure she heard the TARDIS laughing, or as close to a laugh as she could get. As time wore on, she was becoming a lot more in tune to the ship’s noises and remarks, sometimes swearing blind she could hear words or see things inside her head that the TARDIS no doubt put there. By the time the Doctor turned her head back down, Yaz had moved to stand in front of her. There was a smile on her face as she raised her eyebrows, urging the Doctor to actually talk to her. There was a brief moment of resistance, until Yaz combined her look with the stare she had learnt in the force. Unfortunately, under no circumstances whatsoever, could the Doctor resist Yaz’s teasing and intense stare. It was impossible.

“Alright, fine. I don’t need both of you ganging up on me…I just wanted to ask you something but…it’s kinda…”

She stopped for a moment, letting out a small sigh as her eyes dropped from Yaz’s face and down to the dusty purple carpet. She had never noticed before how many microfibres it had. It was a very nice carpet, she would have to thank the TARDIS for her impeccable taste. But she was distracting herself, very badly at that. With her nerves lighting up to new levels, the Doctor decided that her best method would be to retreat. Surely there would be other opportunities for her to maybe finally say what she was thinking about. Today was not one of those days.

“It’s silly. Never mind. Forget I said anything. Sorry. ‘night again, Yaz. Sleep well.”

“Doctor.”

As the Doctor took a step back to leave by turning on her heels, Yaz quickly held on to the front of her coat, gently urging her back to her original position. She wasn’t about to let the Time Lord run away. The Doctor complied, although oddly enough, Yaz could see the beginnings of a blush creeping across her face. She could not remember seeing her blush, if at all, not even when they were exploring planets that were far too hot. Yaz had to admit; it rather suited her, and admired how it brought out the faintest hint of freckles. She had never noticed those before, either. Lifting her hand away from her coat and up to the Doctor’s shoulder, Yaz gave another gentle squeeze, smile softening from amusement to concern. She received one in kind, although the Time Lord’s eyes still fell to the wayside slightly. Although, it was enough of a gesture to get the Doctor to say something. Sort of.

“Can you wash my hair for me?”

The Doctor whispered her words, fumbled over them, kept them too close to her chest. Whatever it was she wanted, she was doing her best to keep it hidden. That earned a shake of a head from Yaz, as well as another squeeze to her shoulder. The Doctor could feel the flush of embarrassment begin to burn her face, reaching up to the tips of her ears and down her neck. Gods, she was a mess. At least Yaz was bright enough to question her awfully worded request.

“Didn’t catch that. Whatever it is, I’m not gonna laugh. I promise. Say it again for me?”

With a shaky breath, the Doctor tried again, forcing herself to enunciate and speak louder.

“I…um…d’ya mind…washing my hair for me?”

It was a strange request, really, on paper. Originally, the thought had cropped up one of the many nights the Doctor spent reading in the library. From one of the many, many books it contained. Somehow, she had been drawn to cheesy romance novels from the twenty-second century, and it was a surprising amount of times the theme had cropped up. There was something about it that seemed to make her feel at ease, fill her with a sense of unknown longing, but she thought nothing of it for weeks until it somehow came back. She had absolutely no problems in washing her own hair, although getting used to more feminine products had been a terrible learning experience. So much so that she had had to go shopping with Yaz for many hours until she found something she liked. But there was something about that idea, something about having someone else take care of her and let her relax, that seemed very appealing. Considering the ratio of people on the TARDIS, her safest bet was to ask Yaz. Yaz was kind, and understanding, and surely she was the least likely to turn down the idea or call her mad.

One thing she had not thought about, however, was how the whole thing was supposed to work. Which, proved evident on the quick flash of shock across Yaz’s face.

“You want me to…wash your hair for you?”

The Doctor gave a shy nod.

“Um…yeah. It’s just, I read it somewhere, and it sounded really nice, and you did such a brilliant job in finding me a shampoo to use, and I trust you…so…um…Like I said, you don’t have to or anything. Just a thought. But. We can do it somewhere else too. There’s proper baths on the TARDIS, you know. As in, a full bath room. You’d love it. Shoulda probably told you lot before, kinda skipped my mind as the TARDIS gave you your own anyway. But yeah, real nice. Sunken into the floor, with bubble jets! And pillows!”

There was a moment where neither said anything, simply looked on, waiting for someone else to speak and decide whatever was about to happen next. The Doctor began to fear that her idea was very much about to be rejected, while Yaz started to wonder if the Time Lord hadn’t just casually taken a peek into her mind one day. Considering she had thought about the Doctor’s hair several times before, after buying the shampoo for her, it seemed much more than a coincidence to her. However, the enthusiasm the Doctor held for the idea was enough to turn her towards it easily. She herself could not resist some shy, sweet request. Not if it came from the Doctor anyway, she was finding herself quite weak for her. Something she was trying to deal with, and failing at miserably.

“Not gonna lie, a whole room that’s just for bathing in sounds really good right about now. I still can't work out this kink in my shoulder from when I tackled that guy last week. Should probably have a soak and let the tension go. Also, you know, everything that happened today.”

Yaz rolled her right shoulder for emphasis, wincing a little as pain shot up her arm.

“Yeah, I’ll do your hair for you Doctor. Wanna borrow some pyjamas and stuff off me for the night and lead the way? Grab whatever takes your fancy.” 

She was met with a wide smile, and in a flash the Doctor was out of her grip and rummaging around in the same drawers she had once been in. Glancing over her shoulder, Yaz was not surprised that one of her star t-shirts and a pair of old plaid shorts were soon hanging from the Doctor’s arms. Not only did they suit her, she could not help but remember the day the Doctor had said she really liked her light blue shirt. Of course she would want to wear it herself. Yaz had a sneaking suspicion that it would suit her much too well, and might consider handing it over.

“Come on, it’s not too far from here. If the TARDIS wants to play nice tonight. Might even run the bath for us too! Oh, I’m excited. This is gonna be great!”

While the Doctor strode confidently down the halls, Yaz followed behind with more trepidation. On the surface, the ask was innocuous, but something about it was hard to ignore. Namely, how the whole event was going to play out. As a child, her mum had washed her hair in the bath, which was a relatively normal occurrence. She would sit in the water and play with the bubbles whilst her mom rinsed away the soap with a jug of water. As a teenager, when she was feeling too sick to sit in hot water or stand under the shower, her mum had leant her over the side of the bath and gotten to work with the shower head. Yaz assumed that that was not the idea the Doctor was thinking of, considering she had mentioned the bath being run already. Which meant that the Time Lord was fully intending on bathing around her.

Which also meant that she would more than likely be joining in with the bath.

Lost in her own world, totally unaware they had reached their destination, Yaz gently bumped into the Doctor’s body. She was holding open a very ornate looking door, smile still on her face, gesturing for Yaz to step inside the offered room. Even in her half-dazed state, she could see that the room was so much more grandiose than most other areas on the TARDIS. Namely, she saw a lot of stone and steam and marble. Continuing with cautious steps, she stepped inside the room, clutching hard at her clothes.

“Doctor…when you said you had a bath room, I didn’t think you meant this…”

What the TARDIS actually had, was a bathhouse.

Hanging from the ceiling and providing the most light, was a chandelier. The thick wooden base held several lights in the shape of flickering candles, and hung over a vast hexagonal pool. Heated stone warmed her bare feet as she stepped further inside, eyes travelling across the marble pillars lining the archways along the walls. The room itself was shrouded in steam, only broken up by the other candles dotted around the room. Several potted plants sat around the pool, providing a splash of brighter colour against the muted grey stone and deep red walls, framing various areas with wide-spread leaves and tiny flowers. Whatever room this was, it looked as if it had been taken straight out of some ancient palace. Which…wouldn’t really surprise her. There were too many sights to focus on, never mind the sound of faint soothing music and the smell of lavender and sandalwood in the air. Yaz started to wonder if she had entered another pocket universe.

When the Doctor joined her, Yaz was amused to see she looked as awestruck as she did. Her eyes were wide and her mouth open, unable to focus on where to look. Her eyes darted around the room, mouth finally closing and turning into a beaming grin.

“Oh! I didn’t know you redecorated this room as well! Proves how much I came in here before, huh? I really like it. Reminds me a bit of…never mind. Anyway, that water looks really inviting. You outdid yourself, old girl. You coming Yaz?”

The Doctor looked around the room again for a moment, jumping a little when she spotted somewhere to leave her clothes. She placed the nightwear on top of the large chest, untangling herself from her coat before looping it over a convenient hook on the wall. Yaz stayed rooted to the spot, unable to tear her eyes away from the sight of the Time Lord sliding the braces off her shoulders and untucking her shirts. She had never seen the Doctor wearing other clothes, aside from one fancy trip, never mind undressing. Thankfully, she somehow managed to regain her composure enough to talk.

“Um. How exactly are we doing this?”

With her hands wrapped around the base of her shirts, just short of beginning to pull them up, the Doctor stopped and thought.

“Oh right, should’ve probably said that. My bad. Got a little over excited. I was gonna say we both just hop on in and go from there, but if that’s gonna make you uncomfortable or such then we can stop. I don’t wanna force this on you or anything. Kinda keep forgetting you humans aren’t at the point yet where casually being around each other in places like this is…acceptable. Which is odd, because the Greeks and Romans did it just fine. You all just got more uncomfortable as time went on. Madness. ‘S just a body, what harm is there in one of those, you all have one.”

The more Yaz thought about it, the more her heart rate sped up and the more her stomach did somersaults. Her hands balled up against her sides, mind frantically weighing up her options. On one hand, the whole situation was entirely unhealthy with regards to her crush on the impossible Time Lord. Despite the amount of times she had wondered, in passing, what the Doctor looked like underneath her many layers. This was not the place to go about discovering what the answer to that was. On the other hand, there was a little bit of a point to the analogy the Doctor prattled on about. There was nothing inherently shameful about what she was doing. All she was doing was washing the Doctor’s hair. She could handle that. Surely she could handle that.

“No, no. It’s fine. Don’t think I could do it properly with that bath unless I was in it too. If I’m going to be washing it, I’d want to do it properly. You know?”

Content with her answer, the Doctor resumed undressing. As soon as Yaz saw the beginnings of pale skin and the soft outline of the Time Lord’s stomach, she turned on her heels and stared at the floor.

She could not handle bathing with the Doctor.

Steadying her nerves with a quiet sigh, Yaz let the nightwear under her arm fall to the floor, giving herself room to undress. Shaking hands struggled with the buttons of her blouse and jeans, leaving her to curse under her breath. The moment was not helped by the sound of the Doctor already stepping into the water. She could hear her sighs, the water lapping against the sides of the bath as she stepped further in. It painted a very vivid image in her mind, causing a spike of heat throughout her body.  


A couple of minutes passed, or lifetimes for Yaz, before she managed to step out of her underwear. Unsure of what to do with the pile of clothes, she kicked them more over to one side and shifted her nightwear over as well. The humid air of the bath room was not helping her terribly flushed cheeks, nor was it making her any more comfortable in wanting to turn around. She could just...stand there a while longer.

Although, that was not going to be the case after all. The Doctor had obviously picked up on her predicament, water splashing again as she spoke, perhaps gesticulating her point.

“Yaz, are you sure you’re alright? We don’t have to do this, you can grab a towel and go back to your room and use your own bathroom.”

As the Doctor spoke, she could feel her mouth going dry. She put it down to the humidity. Obviously. There certainly was not a problem of her realising that Yaz was indeed standing in the room naked. A few feet away. With her back turned. So all she could see was hair delicately falling over her shoulders and the soft curve of her spine. The swell of her hips. Toned legs. Faint lines striping down her thighs.

Perhaps she should have thought more about what she had suggested.

“No, it’s fine, I promise. Just…do you mind just closing your eyes while I get in?”

“Of course.”

For added measure, the Doctor took her hands out of the water and placed them over her eyes, humming out a response. Yaz turned her head, smiling wide at the sight of the Doctor covering her eyes like a child. However, it did nothing but draw her attention to the structure of her arms and the definition of her now strained muscles. With another shaking breath, Yaz made her way over towards the sunken bath. The tiles seemed to get warmer under her feet the closer she got, and soon she guided them over the lip of the white tiles and into the water. It was freezing, at first, and it took all her will not to yelp and leap away. Soon enough, both feet were in the water, Yaz standing on the first step and looking towards the furthest wall. She dared risk a glance down, immediately regretting it as she saw the outline of the Doctor’s full figure rippling under the dappled water. Her eyes soon shot back up again.

The more she submerged herself, the warmer the water got. By the time she was standing in the deepest part, just reaching her hips, she could feel herself relaxing more. It took a few cautious and misplaced steps to get around the Doctor’s legs, but eventually Yaz made it to the other side of the bath. She sat down on the same step as the Time Lord and let out a long sigh as the water came and covered her shoulders. Whatever was in the bath, it was certainly fixing her shoulder up a treat. Yaz stayed silent for a moment, absorbed in the joy of the bath, before turning towards the Doctor and gently tapping her on the shoulder. She still sat with her eyes covered, flinching slightly at the touch before her arms splashed back into the water.

“Thank you. Didn’t expect you to use your hands too. Bit overkill, you know.”

The Doctor shrugged her shoulders slightly, smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

“Well…I was just gonna close my eyes, but then I thought it might look like I’d be cheating or something, so I put my hands up for good measure. Not that I would be cheating. Or looking. Or anything like that. ‘cause that’d make things awkward. For both of us. Which is what I’m doing now, isn’t it? Don’t look at me like that…”

Yaz brushed her shoulder up against the Doctor with a playful nudge, trying to hold back her laughter. For all her insecurities, it was almost impossible to truly dwell on negative thoughts for long whilst in the presence of the Time Lord. Something about her demeanour made her forget anything was wrong at all. Maybe it was the near constant positive energy she naturally exuded. Or, did Time Lord’s just…mess with people on another level. Telepathic empathy or something. Whatever it was, Yaz was thankful for it.

“Doctor, it’s fine. What was it you told us before? Something about it only being natural to be drawn towards looking at new things, even for a moment? Just something the brain does. Anyone else I’d probably chase down with my baton, but you…I don’t think you’d mean it to be anything other than your natural curiosity.”

Did she just invite the Doctor to look at her? Quite possibly.

Yaz saw, for a brief moment, the Doctor’s eyes drift down. Her stare cut through the water, but was soon back up to her face. There was a comforting smile on her face, one that always made Yaz feel at ease. She looked around the room, realising that she had not seen anything that looked like bathroom products. She opened her mouth to question the situation, ask where the shampoo even was, but was stunned by the Doctor holding her nose and dropping into the water. Her hair fanned out around her head like a sodden halo, almost shining under the flickering lights. She stayed under for a long time, shaking her head from side to side, before rising back up again. Blonde locks clung across all parts of her face, barely moving as the Time Lord exhaled loudly. Yaz had never seen such a ridiculous sight before, although it really did fit the Doctor’s personality to a tee.

“You look like a drenched sheepdog.”

Quietly laughing to herself, Yaz parted the hair across the Doctor’s face, pushing it out of her eyes and tucking the various strands behind her ears. Water dripped down her nose and chin, trailing down her neck and leaving small ripples in the water. As her hands moved, brushing past the side of her jaw, Yaz noticed that the Doctor’s signature ear cuff had been taken out as well. She looked open and vulnerable without it.

“Told you that I was good at holding my breath, didn’t I? Also, have to get my hair wet for the shampoo, and that’s the best way to do it. Speaking of, lemme just go grab that real quick. Forgot. Again. Sorry I’m so terrible at this.”

With another splash of water and a flailing of limbs, the Doctor stood up and clambered out of the bath. There was barely enough time for Yaz to avert her gaze, getting another flash of skin. It was odd to see the Doctor with some kind of colour to her skin, so used to the pale milky tone of it, that it startled her. Never mind the shapely thighs and sweeping hips she got an eyeful of. The Doctor had a fine figure. While she was still processing everything, Yaz heard the Doctor exclaim in triumph and swiftly make her way back into the water. The shampoo bottle made a gentle thud against the stone floor as she flashed her a grin.

“There we go. All set. Where’d’ya want me to be?”

Yaz carefully considered her options. It was going to be a pain, twisting around to lather up the Doctor’s hair from the side. Sitting face to face was not going to be an option either. It would be way too hard to look the Time Lord in the eyes as she worked. She could sit on the edge of the bath or kneel, but then her body would cool down from being out of the water and it would more than likely cause too much pain. There was the option of having the Doctor sitting in front of her, but having her knees up to her chest would quickly become too painful for her as well. There really was only one option.

“Let me get onto the higher step. Then you can sit in front. I’ll be able to get into your hair a lot easier that way. Also should be a lot more comfortable for the both of us.”

If the idea made the Doctor uncomfortable in any way, she was very good at hiding it. She seemed to take to the idea very quickly, giving a series of short nods as she waded through the water towards her. Yaz fumbled around in the water until she found the higher step, taking a moment to make sure she was completely comfortable before beckoning the Doctor over towards her. With a small amount of shuffling between them, Yaz holding in a breath as the Doctor slid over to sit in between her legs, a comfortable arrangement was soon reached.

Unsurprisingly, Yaz found herself focusing on the strange sensation that was having someone sitting in front of her. She hadn’t even done it with Sonia, not as kids when they braided each other’s hair, nor when picking out mud and dirt from football. In fact, she couldn’t even remember being so close with some of her best friends from school, nor from her police training course. Not that she avoided being close to people, it had just never been part of her life, unlike some of the other people she knew. She could feel the weight of the Doctor’s body, even though they were not even on the same step, pressing ever so slightly into her own. Small prickles and tingles spread across her legs and chest from the proximity, setting her whole body on edge very quickly. Yaz’s thoughts were racing a mile a minute, much too fast for her liking. She decided to take her mind off the bodily sensations by focusing on the task at hand, what she was sitting in the bath for in the first place. Anything to keep her mind from wandering even further and her hands busy. She was there to wash the Doctor’s hair. Nothing more. There was nothing more going on at all.

Yaz leant over and took the shampoo bottle into her hands, squirting a generous amount of the lilac liquid into her palms, before getting herself tangled up into the Time Lord’s hair. Her fingers worked gently, lather forming quickly, mixture being worked into every inch of the Doctor’s hair and scalp. Every once in a while, Yaz would catch her short nails against the skin, leaving the Time Lord to slouch further backwards and fall deeper into her personal space. She let out a low sigh as Yaz moved to massage behind her ears, drawing a line down to the base of her hairline at the nape of her neck. The more she tended to the Doctor’s needs, the more her body came into contact with her own. Only in the space of a minute, she had come to rest her arms atop her thighs and her shoulders against her chest, head tilted forward for better access to her hair.

Whilst the shampoo was thoroughly worked into the Doctor’s hair, Yaz found herself unable to stop tending to it. She ran it through her fingers, marvelling at the texture and volume of it. It slid between them effortlessly, soon worked back into the mass atop the Time Lord’s head. She wanted to run her fingers through it over and over again, never stopping, just taking everything in selfishly. If it wasn’t for the sudden realisation that the Doctor would be able to feel her rapid heartbeat, she would have continued. Her hands quickly fell into the water, washing away the lather, mindful not to brush past the Doctor’s body. It was bound to send her over the edge, even if it were an accident.

“Mmm, Yaz. Why’d’ya stop? S’really nice.”

Yaz shuffled awkwardly on the spot, fingers wrapping around the edge of the step.

“So it has time to set in a bit before you wash it off. You’ll end up with worse hair if I work it in too much. Overworking it will make it get dirty and greasy quicker.”

The Doctor whined a little, bemoaning the loss of such a wonderful sensation, slowly straightening herself out. Her shoulders came and pressed a little to close into Yaz, sparking her senses and causing her to jolt upright quicker. It was not the time to be thinking about how close she was to Yaz. Eyes fell to the water, watching her own reflection for a moment, smile spreading across her face. A fresh thought appeared in her head, one that was worth playing up to. Pushing herself away from Yaz, leaving the spot between her legs, she twisted around on the spot and lifted her hands to her head. Fingers glided through the lather, bringing up clumps of hair until it briefly stood on end. The tips fell in all directions, but kept sturdy for a while. Grin till on her face, she looked over to Yaz and gestured to her hair.

“What’cha think? Could I pull off a look like this?”

“What, a bubble mohawk? Doctor, are you three years old or something?”

Yaz tried to hold back a laugh, but it slipped out, causing the Doctor’s face falling into a mock frown as a result.

“Oi! I think it looks cool. Used to have spiky hair once, everyone seemed to like it a lot."

“Whatever you say, Doctor. Tell you what; if you wash all that off now, I’ll do a second wash for you. Give your hair the full works. Sound like a plan?”

The Doctor did not need telling twice. Quickly washing her hands of shampoo, she held onto her nose once more and dove into the water. Soap bubbles spread in all directions as she submerged to a deeper level, twisting her head in all directions and using her free hand to push away the lather. Hazel-green eyes opened up to the clear waters, watching the tiles shimmer and sway. The Doctor turned her head back around to the front, pausing as she inadvertently studied the clean sweeping lines of Yaz’s legs. She always knew that her companion had to be in great physical condition, considering how quick she was on the draw when it came to running in a crisis. Not to mention her police training. So many things added up to make an undeniably eye-catching Yaz.

Quickly clearing the rest of the shampoo from her hair, the Doctor rose back out of the water, sliding the hair from her face with both hands. She squeezed around several sections of it and drew most of the heavier moisture away, very faint twists already becoming apparent thanks to the heated air. Yaz gave a smile and a nod her way, signalling for her to return to her seated position. Not entirely ready to have her senses set alight again, the Doctor slid through the water and took her place back on the step. There was something about the faint hiss of the shampoo bottle as Yaz squeezed more mixture into her hands, that sent shivers up and down her spine. There was something about having hands drawing circles against her scalp, fingers tending to her, that disabled her ability to think far too quickly.

“Head back a bit.”

The Doctor tilted her head on command, eyes studying the chandelier on the ceiling. She felt Yaz slide her fingers into her hair, shuddering at the cold shampoo touching her skin. After a few moments, the lather was already starting to build, and she felt herself begin to relax into the touch again. The Doctor sighed, eyes closing as she let Yaz do her work. She could feel the flex of her fingers, palms brushing against the back of her head, pressing down into her with every motion. She felt calm, relaxed, her heart rate slowing ever so slightly. When she opened her eyes again, she felt Yaz push her head forward and tipping her down, drawing slow lines up the back of her neck and massaging the muscles there. It was impossible for her to keep the words on her tongue.

“Stars, Yaz…you’re too good at this.”

Yaz felt herself flush with pride at the drawled remark

“Aha, living up to expectations I hope?”

Rather than responding with any kind of sentence, Yaz stilled when the Doctor let out a strange noise. She could not work out if it was a whine…or some kind of purr…but whatever it was, the Time Lord had slipped a little further under the water and was leaning heavily into her chest. She could feel her burning skin against her own, wet against dry. In her time on the TARDIS, she had never seen anything like it. The Doctor was so full of energy and life, constantly running around all over the place without a care in the world, so having her practically melting in her lap in a bath was too much for her brain to process in one go. It felt like she was around a completely different person. Although, considering the amount of things she didn’t know about the Doctor, it was possible that this was normal for her; she was just very easy to disable.

_ ‘Am I dreaming?’ _

Dragging her hands back up, Yaz continued to work the lather into the Doctor’s hair. She kept her place slow and lingering, making sure to return to back behind her ears and drag her nails across the skin there whenever she could. It gave the most vocal response, while pressing her thumbs and massaging the dips at the back of her head caused her shoulders to finally fall completely limp. The more Yaz thought about it, the more she realised how deeply intimate the moment was. She was being let into such a private moment with the Doctor, and was not about to forget it in a hurry. Gods, there was no way she could forget even if she wanted to. The way her body responded to her touch, and how her own responded in kind; soft and warm and alive. Her heart was racing again, but she didn’t care. She did notice the small drops of sweat that clung to her brow from the humidity, her hair sticking to her cheeks and neck, tickling her skin.

She wondered, then, how soft the Doctor’s skin truly felt.

  
  


Yaz bit down on her lip as she piled the lathered hair atop the Doctor’s head and pulled her hands away. She once again washed the bubbles from her hands and wrapped her fingers around the edge of the step, gripping as hard as she could. It kept her grounded. Anything to get rid of the thoughts racing inside her head. The Doctor quietly sighed, shuffling a little on the spot until she had her head resting on Yaz’s shoulder. She looked up with a tired gaze, smile on her face as Yaz regarded her with one in kind.

“I thought all this sounded nice, but you…you just blew it out of this world. Haven’t felt this good in a long time. Decades, at least. You’ve got magic hands, I swear.”

A hand came to rest against her knee under the water, and Yaz swore her heart skipped a beat at the gesture. It had to have done, if the pain in her chest was anything to go by. Before she had time to process it, it was gone, and so was the Doctor. She went back to the centre of the bath to dive under the water and wash her hair clean of lather. Yaz moved one of her hands to where the Doctor’s had been, her other hand coming out of the water to rest against her chest and map the heavy rhythmic pulsing of her heart. It was out of sync, out of time, and soon enough her time with the Doctor would be up as well. Of all the times to slip into a pining melancholy, this was not the most appropriate she could have found herself in. What would Yaz do when her time with the Doctor was up? How would it end even? Would she be able to walk away from such a fantastic life, or…? Her thoughts were swiftly interrupted.

Unlike before, when the Doctor surfaced from the water, she did not linger. Instead, she made her way to the other side of the bath and draped her hands over the sides and onto the warm tiles. As her head tilted back to the ceiling, Yaz could see more of the definition of her arms and the sharp slope of her neck. As well as the blurred lines of her chest underneath the water. In order to stop herself from staring any longer, Yaz took the Doctor’s break as an opportunity to soak her own hair. She did so with a similar manner, but did not let her head drop underneath the water itself. Her hair fanned out across her side of the bath, hands dragging it down for a moment before she sat back upright. Slinging it across her shoulders, she went to reach for the shampoo bottle, pausing as the Doctor spoke.

“Yaz. Before you do that…mind coming here a sec?"

Yaz lowered her hand, watching the Doctor for a moment, before responding.

“Oh. Uh. Sure thing.”

Being careful with her footing, Yaz stood low before the Doctor, eyebrows arched in confusion. The Time Lord opened her arms and beckoned her to slot herself between them. Mimicking their former position with the roles reversed, Yaz found herself sitting with her back towards the Doctor, arms reaching into the water to take hold of her hands. They were lifted up at such an angle so the Doctor could bring them up to her face. Unable to see what exactly was going on, Yaz’s body stiffened considerably as the Doctor pressed a gentle kiss to the knuckles of her left hand. It was only fleeting, barely a ghost of a kiss, but it was enough to set her skin burning from the contact. Her only, repeating, thought was to how soft the Time Lord’s lips felt.

“Thank you.”

The Doctor repeated the motion to her right hand, mumbling into her joints, hot breath scalding her more than the kiss did.

“I really appreciate it.”

She alternated kisses twice more, leaving Yaz entirely lost for words. She had just been given some of the most intimate kisses of her entire life. What even was there to say in response? The Doctor had never been so open with her, in all the time they had travelled together. Sure, there had been pats on the shoulder and the odd brief hug here and there, but this was entirely different. Something new and Yaz was unsure what to feel. Although her mind had chaotically swung between thinking the whole thing was way too stressful and it being the best thing ever, she could at least say it had not been a problem. Yaz realised she would do anything for the Doctor, no matter how small or insignificant.

“I-it wasn’t…anything much…I’m just glad you liked it.”

Yaz felt her hands being let go of, deposited back into the hot water. The Doctor brought her arms around her waist, pulling her close until her back was now flush against her chest. As her fingers came to rest on her hips, tracing a line over the bones, she felt the Doctor rest her chin on top of her head. It was a comfortable sort of pressure, Yaz realised. The Doctor’s jaw bounced against her skull as she spoke, sending vibrations through her.

“Liked it? I loved it. Told you, best thing ever.”

As the Doctor lowered her head down, nose nestled into Yaz’s wet hair and taking in the way she still smelt uniquely her, she dropped a lingering kiss against her neck. Unable to control her body, Yaz felt her shoulders slump as a lump started to form in her throat. She had not expected the Doctor to be affectionate. She had not expected a lot of things, it had turned out. Her only thought was that; maybe the Doctor knew. Every now and again, she had dropped hints about telepathy or heightened senses or something like that. Considering their close proximity and her current behaviour, there was nothing to say that could not be one explanation. Yaz felt her whole body going weak, muscles falling limp as she relaxed further into the Doctor’s touch. She was powerless to stop herself from dropping, getting closer, taking all the contact. However, she quickly snapped back to attention when the Doctor spoke again.

“Want me to return the favour?”

“Uh…”

Yaz pulled herself away and turned to face her. There was sincerity and kindness in the Doctor’s eyes, such warmth and genuine want that Yaz found herself paralysed. The faint light of the room seemed to make the Time Lord glow, flickering flames reflected in her hazel-green irises. Yaz wanted to stare at her forever, map out the markings on her skin with her eyes, take in all the little details that bundled together to make the Doctor. She wanted to notice her freckles, the scar on her chin, the way her face shifted every time she felt any kind of emotion. Her crush burst to the forefront of her mind, heart aching with an inexplicable longing she had been burying for far too long. A longing for someone she could never truly have. One thing she did have, was the moment she was in. Crush be damned, she was going to be selfish and take whatever she could from the Time Lord while she had the chance to do so.

“I’d like that."

That brilliant smile she loved so much returned, and the Doctor urged her to retrieve the bottle of shampoo from the other side of the bath. While Yaz did as instructed, it gave the Doctor the briefest of moments to ponder something that she had been giving no thought to the whole time she had been around her fam.

Ever since she had had the moments to notice her companions, really take them in, she had wondered about Yaz’s hair. Every time they went on an adventure, she would wear it in a different style. Sometimes up, sometimes down, and sometimes a mixture of the two. Most of the time it was straight, very occasionally with waves. The Doctor found herself fixated on it. It looked so well cared for, so soft and inviting, and she had lost track of how many times she had had the urge to run her fingers through it. In passing, she had heard Yaz talk about how her mum and Nani had braided it for her as a young girl. She wondered what Yaz looked like with her hair curled…

Too many thoughts, not enough time. Yaz returned, handing the bottle over before settling back into their familiar arrangement. The Doctor had to forcibly tear her eyes away from the subtle definition of the muscles in Yaz’s shoulders, the parts that peaked out from dark hair clinging to her back. With a shaky breath, she squeezed the shampoo into one hand, dropping the bottle to the side. She took a moment to coat both hands in the floral scented mixture, careful not to let any fall into the water, before sliding her hands over the top of Yaz’s head. Fingers pushed the shampoo into her hair, almost kneading it into her roots. The Doctor ran both hands from root to tip, taking the long hair and rubbing it slowly between her palms.

She had never had long hair herself, at least, not as long as Yaz’s was. The Doctor had to admit she had no real idea what she was doing when it came to hair care either. Some of her regenerations had been vain about the subject, while others had not. As a woman, there had been nobody to practice on, which had further exasperated the bizarre longing she had. Still, Yaz was seemingly enjoying the experience, which she was entirely grateful for. Her head rolled back and forth as she moved to work the shampoo into every single hair, a barely audible sigh passing over her lips, spurring her on to work her fingers through her hair even more. The Doctor also felt the urge to confess something that had been on her mind for a long time.

“Can I…can I say something?”

“Mmm? Sure, Doctor.”

As she worked the last bits of shampoo into Yaz’s hair, the Doctor stilled her movements, carefully contemplating what it was she wanted to try and express.

“I lo- um, I really like your hair. Is that weird? It’s just that…oh, you can do anything with it and it looks great. Plus, it’s really soft and obviously well looked after. I…I guess I kind of wanted to tell you that for a while now.”

Finished with her task, the Doctor gave Yaz a gentle tap on her shoulder and watched as she twisted on the spot to meet her gaze. Small strands of hair fell either side of her face, the temptation there to tuck them behind her ears. Yaz saw an even darker flush across the Doctor’s cheeks and down her neck, something not likely to have come from the humid room they were in. She took a moment to study her expression again, truly gauge what she was putting across, before smiling. While Yaz had heard people say things about her hair before, mostly when she wore it curled or in some kind of stylised way, but she had not expected the Doctor to join the ranks of those fawning over it.

“You like my hair?”

The Doctor’s eyes fell down to the water as she hummed quietly before responding.

“It’s beautiful. Honestly. You’re so st- You’re…um…I…yeah.”

_ ‘You’re beautiful. Brilliant. Amazing. Gorgeous. Oh, Yaz…one day, I swear I’ll tell you all of those things and more. I promise you that.’ _

Yaz found herself faltering, torn between focusing on the first statement or what was to be a follow-up. She could take the compliment, or wonder endlessly about what she tried to deny was coming next. The Doctor was holding something back, clearly, but then again so was she. They were a right pair. Both of them were unintentionally skirting around a topic that neither of them knew how to broach. An endless dance of frustration and well-guarded secrets. One of them had to break but neither would rise to the challenge or crumble under the thick blanket of tension in the air. But Yaz would think about that later. If it wasn’t for the fact that Yaz knew she had to wash the shampoo out of her hair before it made its condition worse, she would have broached the subject further.

At best, all she could muster was a muted ‘thank you’ under her breath before she moved to the other side of the bath to push her head under the water. Dark eyes looked up at the ceiling, tilting back as far as possible to watch the Doctor watching her. Either it was her imagination, or something had begun to shift in the Time Lord. Her eyes looked darker and her posture was stiffer, as if she were ready to leave at a moment’s notice. A coiled spring waiting to launch itself into something unknown. The Doctor watched Yaz sway from side to side, hands coming out of the water to brush away the lather and bubbles, dragging fistfuls of hair under the surface and pull away the final knots.

Slinging the mass of hair over one shoulder as she moved up again, Yaz looked over towards the wall and let out a quiet sigh. Her mind was playing tricks on her, it had to be. The Doctor was fine, she was seeing changes that weren’t really there, projecting her own feelings onto her instead of dealing with them. Seeing what she wanted to see. At least the whole experience was about to be over, all she had to do was condition her hair with the products in her own bathroom and she would be set for the night. The Doctor was not, conversely, making any plans to leave. As Yaz turned around to mention her plan of leaving, she saw the Time Lord reclining back against the side of the bath again. As the Doctor was not looking at her this time, head against the stone floor, the temptation to look at her was overwhelming.

So, she did just that.

Dark eyes took the time to fully study what parts of the Doctor she could take in. She had already noticed the defined muscles of the Time Lord’s arms, but as the lights seemed to focus on her, they stood out even more. Underneath her lays of shirts and her coat, they were hardly there. She had seen her with her sleeves rolled up before, back when she had first landed in Sheffield, but she was so busy dealing with - everything - that she had not noticed. Time and again, her forearms had been on show, but it seemed the most mass was around her biceps. Yaz had never seen the Doctor lift a finger in terms of exercise, save for their countless hours spent running. And considering she somehow ran like she was swimming, it wasn’t that much of a surprise she had good upper body definition. Especially after the crane incident...gods, Yaz had been so terrified that the Doctor was just going to lose her grip and plummet to the ground.

The light continued to make her now flushed skin glow, drawing Yaz’s eyes down towards the slope of the Doctor’s neck. She followed it further, watching how it moved as she swallowed thickly, jaw twitching. Again, she wondered how soft her skin was, how it would feel under her fingertips and how the Doctor would react. Would she push her away? Stay still? Call her forward? Too many possibilities. Yaz continued her journey down, eyes following the sharp lines of her clavicles. She had never been one for noticing such a detail before, but with all the low tops the Doctor wore, it was becoming harder not to. Along with the urge to touch her skin, a strange fire started to grow within her; she wanted to run her lips along the Doctor’s shoulders, across her collarbones, travel down her breastbone…

Mentally chastising herself, Yaz let out a weary sigh and sank further into the water, feeling warmth cover her shoulders. She let herself drift away, fall under the spell of the relaxing scent in the air, collect her mind. Yaz had to get out of the bath, as a matter of urgency, before her mind fell further and further away from her. Control was slipping, and if she wasn’t careful, she knew she would ask something she would later regret. She would ask the one question that had been plaguing her for months. But…she also needed to wash. Just doing her hair was not really a bath at all, and considering she had had a very chaotic day, it was more than called for. Yaz brought her attention back to the Doctor, speaking from just above the water’s surface.

“Doctor, where do you keep all the other lotions and potions in this place? Like, for washing and stuff.”

Lifting her head up from the side of the bath, the Doctor looked over to Yaz with half-lidded eyes, a sight that almost caused her heart to stop.

“There’s a basket somewhere over there. S’where I got the shampoo from. Probably find a loofah or something there too. I’ll do your back for you if you want, save you doing any more damage to that shoulder of yours. Don’t want you in any more trouble, you’re practically the cornerstone of this operation. Even if I say it’s a flat team structure.”

_ ‘Don’t say yes, don’t say yes, don’t say-’ _

“Sure.”

The words came out before she could stop them, and Yaz was half tempted to try and swallow her own tongue in frustration. She was not helping her own situation at all, and it was like some unknown force was driving her back towards the Doctor, pulling her in at an exponential rate. With a quick smile, the Doctor lay her head back down on the side of the bath and left Yaz enough space to step out without any notice. She looked around the room for whatever basket the Doctor had mentioned, finding it hidden beside the chest she had dumped her clothes on top of. Inside was a vast array of strange looking bottles, but she soon found something that she recognised as a body wash. However, the words on the front of the bottle were nothing she could understand. Holding on to a small wash cloth as well, Yaz made her way back into the water with a yelp and a shudder. The temperature differentiation was becoming a real problem, leaving her no longer wanting to leave the safety of the warm water at all. Hearing the noise, the Doctor lifted her head back up again, catching sight of the bottle and shuffling back into the needed position.

“Brilliant. Come sit here again and just lean forward a bit so I can get all of your back.”

Yaz handed the bottle and cloth over to the Doctor, settling between her legs and doing as instructed. She slung her hair over her shoulder, resting her arms in her lap and waited patiently. She felt the water around her back shifting as the Doctor soaked the cloth, the bottle making a wheezing sound as she covered the surface with the body wash. Yaz shuddered at the contact of the cold liquid and heard the Time Lord mutter an apology under her breath. After a few moments, when the liquid was worked into her skin, everything began to feel strangely warm and tingly. Prickles were travelling over Yaz’s skin wherever the cloth had been, and when the Doctor travelled up to her injured shoulder and began to massage the tender muscle, all Yaz could to was keen back into her touch and sigh. It was wonderful. The tension melted away from her, pain leaving not long after, and she found herself not wanting to leave at all anymore. Whatever was in the lotion she chose, she wanted it for every muscular injury she was ever going to receive in her life. That, and the Doctor’s skilled hands to work it into her. She was far better than Yaz had ever been at looking after herself.

The Doctor, having done some of her work, returned to washing the rest of Yaz’s back. She watched intently at the subtle movements she made, how her spine twisted to follow her touch, and how the muscles in her shoulders flexed and rolled. Sure, she knew everything there was to know about anatomy – not just of humans, but of a great many species, including her own – but there was something entirely too mesmerizing about how Yaz was simply giving herself over to her. The Doctor followed the line of her spine, covering as much bare skin as she could without dipping into the water itself. With the force behind her arms, she found herself leaning in considerably closer than she would have liked, but didn’t want to leave. She lingered behind Yaz’s head, nose brushing through her hair, taking in the scent of the shampoo mixed with the lotion beneath her. It was an alluring, heady mix of florals, drawing her ever closer until the cloth was discarded into the water and her lips were brushing against the back of Yaz’s neck.

Time stopped.

Everything stopped.

Every muscle in her body ceased moving, deathly silence and stillness filling the humid air with tension far too thick. Neither moved, not a fraction, and Yaz felt the air burning in her lungs. She wanted to speak, to ask and question, but instead her body completely betrayed her as a quiet sigh passed over her lips. Not quiet enough for the Doctor not to notice, however. Her hearing was far too finely tuned not to pick it up.

“D…Doctor.”

Another kiss was pressed into her skin, against one of her protruding vertebrae, lips searing hot and inviting. Yaz had lost all concept of reason. After all her time spent wondering, confusion running rampant and tearing her apart from the inside, she was getting the attention she had wanted. And yet, it still bothered her. Dragging up any ounce of self-control she could find, Yaz shifted in the water until she was face to face with the Doctor. Her gaze was only met briefly, before the Time Lord turned her attention to the water, strands of hair shrouding her face. Yaz wanted to push them aside, to see her fully, but held back. She wasn’t strong enough to resist doing something else instead. So, she asked the question that had been burning her for so long.

“Doctor, what-”

She was cut off.

“Yaz…I’m sorry…I just…”

Hearing the weak, staggered words made her heart break. Yaz moved closer towards the Doctor, placed a hand on her shoulder, soon greeted with flushed cheeks and glistening hazel-green eyes. It looked like she was about to start crying then and there. Yaz held her own tongue, biting down on the tip, giving the Doctor the space she needed to carry on talking. It was the least she could do under the circumstances, her own thoughts could wait until the Time Lord had said her piece.

“I just…your skin’s so soft and your hair is lovely, and you’re so nice and caring, and sometimes it makes my brain go all weird and confused and out of sync and I-”

The Doctor was feeling it too. The Doctor knew. Yaz knew.

How long had both of them been dancing around the same subject? How long had both of them ignored what was clearly staring them in the face?

“And you wanted to kiss me?”

Not that the Doctor hadn’t already, she had kissed her knuckles more times than Yaz could even remember at that point, but the feelings that came from them were nothing compared to the ones she felt from the lips against her neck. Those had been friendly, soft and almost familial, but that…that was something else entirely. So charged with something intense and unspoken, something only Yaz would understand. She watched the Doctor nod, slowly, trying to hide her face by turning to the side. Yaz urged her back with her free hand, pressing it against a burning cheek and gently turning the Time Lord’s face back around. She needed to see her, her eyes, her expression. Everything, just to know for sure.

“Do you still want to?”

Yaz was taken aback by her own brazen and bold response, words coming out of her mouth before her brain had time to even begin processing the consequences of them. She watched as the Doctor’s eyes bore into her own, searching for the words to answer the question correctly. The Time Lord found them quickly, lips twitching slightly. As her hearts began to pound in her chest to a rhythm she thought had long since died, the Doctor felt safe in letting her guard down, safe in telling Yaz the one thing she had wanted to tell her since the day she had laid eyes on her in Sheffield.

“Yes.”

She let out a huff of a laugh in response, and Yaz stroked her thumb across the Doctor’s cheekbone as she closed her eyes. Her heart felt like it was fit to burst. The Doctor actually liked her back. It was more than she ever could have asked for, more to her than the fact the Time Lord had admitted to wanting to kiss her.

“Good. Because I’ve wanted t-”

Without so much as a warning, the Doctor leant forward and kissed her. Properly. It was gentle and testing, reserved even, lips just brushing across the corner of her mouth. Yaz smiled, moving her hand from the Doctor’s cheek to the back of her neck. She pushed her back towards her, delighting in the slow escalation. When the Doctor kissed her again, there was more weight behind it. She pressed their lips together hard, teeth nervously grazing against her bottom lip, causing Yaz to sigh against her. Their current position was much too awkward, she realised, leaving her to pull away and watch the Doctor’s face fall into confusion. She soon caught up to the moment, placing her hands against Yaz’s shoulders and guiding her back until she was flush against the edge of the bath. After a few seconds, Yaz found the Doctor’s legs wrapping around either side of her own, body resting in her lap as she leant down and rested her forehead against her own.

“Yasmin Khan, you’ve got no idea how long I’ve waited for this. How long I’ve thought about this. Not exactly how I was envisioning this to go if I’m honest.”

True, it was not how Yaz had pictured the moment either. Her own thoughts had led her to a secret confession in the library, or the console room, not naked in a bath with the Doctor looking at her like she was the most important thing in the universe. Yaz pushed her head forward, moving the Doctor away enough so she could properly look into her eyes and smile.

“Me either. Maybe you should stop wasting time then, Doctor.”

The Doctor smiled back, corners of her lips curling to a wicked grin as her eyes sparkled with mirth instead of tears.

“Your wish is my command.”

Without reservation, with nothing to hold her back any longer, the Doctor let herself go and feel everything she had pushed deep down for so long. Gone was the reservation and trepidation, replaced instead by sure and considered movements. She kissed Yaz with every fibre of her being, took her lip between her teeth with a gentle tug and drew out a quiet moan. With her moment at hand, the Doctor wrapped her arms around the back of Yaz’s neck and let her tongue slide effortlessly into her mouth, delighting in the change to press herself as close as she could. The contact was electric to her, she could feel everything so deeply and so clearly. Yaz felt like she was unable to breathe, unable to focus on anything aside from the Doctor’s tongue drawing a line across her teeth and taking all control away from her. She could feel the confusing difference in body temperature - the Doctor’s forever cool skin against the burning of her own – and the weight of her body pushing her hard against the back of the bath.

And then it was gone, just as soon as it came. The Doctor reclined back on her thighs with a smile on her face. Yaz swore she looked too pleased with herself, but really, she was still trying to process what had just happened, mourning the loss of contact.

“Why’d you stop?”

“’cause I’m still a gentleman. Come on, there’s some really nice towels on the radiator. Actual Egyptian cotton, soft and plush and cozy. We should get ourselves out before we stay in here all night. Not that that would be a bad thing of course.”

Yaz playfully batted at her shoulder, moving the Doctor out of her lap and back into her own space. While her head was still swimming, her heart was full and fit to burst. The Doctor had kissed her. Kissed her with such passion and want. Her days of wondering had not been in vain. She would focus on the question of ‘what now’ later on. All she had to do was get out of the bath. Despite having just had the Time Lord in her lap, Yaz found herself feeling self-conscious again, head turning towards the towels. Chewing on her bottom lip briefly, Yaz quickly turned her eyes back to the Doctor. Bubbling away under her want to hide, was a brave streak. She could feel it worming its way to the surface slowly, urging her on, telling her not to care. What would it matter if the Doctor looked at her? She already had.

She already had her.

Wringing some of the water from out of her hair and slinging it over her right shoulder, Yaz rose out of the water and stepped back onto the warm stones. Her steps were slow and deliberate, casually guiding her over towards the giant white towels. She ran the material through her fingers, marvelling at the plush feel, before wrapping it under her arms tightly. The sound of splashing water diverted her attention back to the back, Yaz catching sight of the Doctor coming towards her. She turned her head quickly, cheeks starting to burn as the sight of the Time Lord etched itself into her mind again. Pale hands reached out and took the other towel, the Doctor mimicking Yaz’s wrap before running her fingers through her hair and shaking her head like a wet dog. Cool water drops hit Yaz’s shoulder, causing her to smile and chuckle.

“Doctor, that’s not going to dry your hair you know. And watch where you’re shaking too, that water’s freezing!”

“Sorry Yaz. Still not really used to this amount of hair. You got a hairdryer in your room at all? Think I’m gonna need it. Also, sorry I got you to drag your night stuff in here. Plan’s gone a bit all over.”

True, once the bath was over, Yaz had been fully intending to get dressed as quickly as possible. But at the moment, she felt comfortable in just being around the Doctor in a towel. It was certainly a lot warmer than the clothes she had chosen for the night.

“It’s alright. I don’t mind. Let’s get back to mine and I’ll dry your hair. You can pay me back by putting mine in a braid for the night.”

“Wait. You’re gonna trust me with that? Why’d’ya tie it up at night?”

As they both gathered up their belongings, the Doctor abandoning her boots for lack of space in her arms, Yaz explained the reasoning behind her nightly braiding routine. Although she wore her hair up most of the time, if not all of it, on the days when she couldn’t be bothered to then she preferred her hair to have waves in it. Sure, her hair was naturally curly to some point, but she hid it under straighteners out of routine. It made her feel more comfortable around other people, especially after she had been picked on as a kid in school. Since being around the Doctor, Ryan and Graham, she had found pieces of her self-confidence returning. Yaz felt comfortable in looking how she wanted, and also by extension – telling the Doctor about those feelings.

“So, if you sleep with your hair done all fancy, it goes curly? How come I’ve never seen this before?! Right, well, I’m gonna give you the best braid ever. Learnt how to do it back in ancient Greece. Or was it Rome? One of the two.”

The Doctor lead her out of the room, taking one step back out into the TARDIS halls before jumping back a little. Compared to the nice warm stones under her feet in the bath room, the rest of the TARDIS was utterly freezing. She studied the hall for a moment, mentally calculating how quickly she could make it to Yaz’s room, and the soft plush carpet. Mostly she had wished that her ship had been kind enough to heat the whole area, but that evidently wasn’t the case. Sucking air between her teeth, she turned to Yaz with an apologetic smile.

“Seems like it’s a bit cooler out there than it is in here. Might wanna just put your socks back on for a little bit. I know I am, I trust these thick knit socks, haven’t steered me wrong yet.”

Yaz took a testing step herself, less phased at the temperature difference than the Doctor. She flashed a grin at her, bundling clothes under her arms as her hands gripped on to the top of the towel.

“Or. I race you.”

Before the Doctor could interject, Yaz was taking long strides back to the safety of her room. At least with the boys otherwise occupied, she ran no risk of any awkward encounters along the way. It took a few seconds for the Doctor to catch on to what was happening, huffing in annoyance before fumbling around with her own piles of clothes before attempting to give chase. She shouted down the hallway to Yaz, cursing her for the impromptu challenge, but was met with little more than excited laughter. When the Doctor eventually made her way into Yaz’s bedroom, she saw her sitting on the edge of her bed with a very proud smile across her face. She shot her an accusatory glare, dropping her clothes on the floor and closing the door behind her. As she did so, the light in the room became brighter, leaving her able to navigate her way to the bed and sit down with a mock angry huff.

“That wasn’t fair you know.”

“Yes it was, you’re just a sore loser, Doctor.”

The Doctor continued to huff for a moment, instigating a stare off with Yaz for all of about five seconds, before she cracked and laughed.

“Maybe a little. Do you want me to do your hair first or?”

Yaz lifted a hand to the Doctor’s hair, gently letting her fingers slide through it. It was already starting to dry and curl in various places, something she had not seen since Bilehurst. The Doctor leant slightly into her touch, realising she was never going to get tired of anyone playing with her hair. She watched Yaz make her way to the other side of the bed, click something into something else, and return dragging a hairdryer and a brush across the bed. Much like their seating arrangement in the bath, Yaz took her place behind the Doctor, but opted for a crossed legged approach instead. After a brief amount of shuffling, finding a moment to drag a bottle of conditioner off her bedside table, she set to work on sorting out the Doctor’s damp blonde hair.

The silky mixture effortlessly glided through her hair, Yaz taking the time to make sure she stayed away from the roots. She did wonder whether or not her supply would be any suited to the Time Lord, but continued on regardless. Really, Yaz was more than happy just to lose herself in the relaxing conditioning process and pampering the Doctor. Leaning backwards slightly, arms wrapped around her waist to keep the towel in place, the Doctor let her eyes slide closed as Yaz worked her magic again. The actual conditioning itself did not take long at all, leaving her feeling remiss as the bed shifted and the sound of the hairdryer caught her attention. Warm air tickled the back of her ears, the nape of her neck, hair being tamed by skilled fingers and a soft bristled brush. She had been full of energy earlier, more than ready to go…but the Doctor had to admit that the more Yaz worked, the more tired she became. In order to uphold her promise completely, the Doctor leant forward away from Yaz, turning to look over her shoulder.

“It’ll do fine on its own now. Keep going and I might fall asleep on you. I don’t know what you’re doing but it’s dragging me closer and closer to being unable to stay awake at all. Come on, lemme do yours now.”

Turning the hairdryer off, Yaz set it down on the bed and handed the brush over to the Doctor. She turned around on the bed, moving to sit on the other edge, waiting for the Time Lord to sit behind her. Hair fell across her shoulders as she pushed it all back, hands resting in her lap as she felt the bed dipping behind her. Also, fingers cracking. The Doctor was amusingly serious about the whole affair. Pale arms snaked around her side to get hold of a blue faux-velvet hair tie, dropping it near Yaz’s hip for later. As the room fell silent, she began to think back to how on earth braiding even worked. She let the dark locks of hair fall through her fingers, like a waterfall, teasing it through her hands and across her wrists. Strands were pulled together, parts separated into three so she could work easier. Lost in her deep concentration, the Doctor’s lips parted and her tongue made her way out into the open, eyes following each movement of her hands as she carefully pulled each part of the braid into place.

“Doctor…”

Yaz moved slightly on the spot, too concerned with the silence. Not that she wasn’t enjoying just being in the company of the Doctor, it was brilliant even, but it was bothering her. Something was bothering her anyway. She felt her hair being gently coerced into place, the Doctor humming a response out to her as she worked.

“What’re you gonna do…you know…after you’ve done my hair?”

The motions against her head stilled, the Doctor’s hands resting against the back of her towel. She grumbled a little bit, biting her tongue briefly before returning back to her task.

“Dunno. Should sleep though, running a little behind. Was due a power nap a few days ago but I just…kind of forgot. Too busy doing other things. Which was why I wanted to do your hair now before I fell asleep. I can keep my eyes open right now and all, but if you’d carried on then I wasn’t lying when I said I was a goner back there.”

Yaz hummed a response, feeling words over her tongue before finding the curiosity to speak again.

“Why don’t you stay here? I mean…if you want to that is. You can go back to your room or whatever, and keep my pyjamas.”

Judging by the hands brushing past her shoulders, the Doctor was about half way through her hair. From where she was, Yaz was already impressed, feeling the tight weaving across the back of her head. There was an unsettling fluttering in her stomach as she broached the idea of the Time Lord staying with her for the night. They had done it a few times, but only out of necessity, and not inside the TARDIS. Only ever on strange alien worlds or in various human time periods. If the Doctor could innocuously ask her about washing her hair, then Yaz was sure it would be fine for her to ask her own question. Less of a request. Just…testing the waters. It wasn’t life or death if the Doctor decided to decline, she would manage, after all her night had been rewarded with a kiss.

The same strange silence fell between them, leaving Yaz’s knees to start bouncing in anxious anticipation. She really didn’t like the Doctor going silent on her. Thankfully, she did eventually end up responding, not before muttering some kind of curse as the ends of the braid fell away from her fingertips.

“You mean, like a sleepover?”

It was much too endearing how the Doctor’s mind came to the more childish sense of the word, but for all intents and purposes, she was spot on. Yaz was pretty much suggesting a sleepover, and it was hard not to quietly chuckle at the response. It was her answer, which the Time Lord seemed to accept without question. She felt the Doctor return to the last part of braiding her hair, one hand reaching past her to pick up the hair tie and begin wrapping around the end of the braid. There was a small exclamation of joy from behind her, spurring Yaz to turn around and stare at the widest smile on the Doctor’s face.

“Best braid ever, if I do say so myself. Come on! Let me show you how it looks. Mirror’s in the bathroom right?”

Still dressed in no more than thick towels, the Doctor took Yaz’s hand and near dragged her over the side of the bed to the bathroom. Fumbling over her feet and clinging to her towel did nothing to deter the Time Lord as she yanked down the light pull and illuminated the small room. With a gentle shove, Yaz found herself standing in front of the mirror, just a hint of the Doctor’s body behind her in the reflection. She turned her head slowly, eyes widening slightly. What she saw was...not what she had expected. Her hair had been tightly strung together, forming a slender and delicate braid that lay between her shoulders. It looked like there had been more than three weaves involved, there had to be, considering the neverending amount of layers she could see twisted into her hair. It looked more like a work of art, than a hairstyle. After a moment, the Doctor came to rest her chin on her shoulder, eyeing her up like a puppy. She wanted an answer. Validation for her efforts.

“Do you…um…do you like it?”

“I…”

_ ‘You daft old alien,of course I love it! I don’t even know how you pulled this off but it’s beyond words. Gorgeous. Beautiful. Wonderful.’ _

Yaz tilted her head to the side, resting it against the fluffy blonde hair.

“I love it! Thank you, Doctor. You did great. Really.”

The two of them stayed close to each other for a while, Yaz taking the braid over her shoulder so an idle hand could twist the tips of hair around her fingers. As much as she wanted to stay in the moment forever, she was slowly becoming a lot cooler, meaning that nice fluffy pyjamas were certainly called for. As a shudder wracked her body, the Doctor stepped back, quickly realising the situation they were both in. She gestured for Yaz to stay where she was, disappearing out of the room. In a flash, a set of pyjamas slid their way across the white tiles.

“Sorry I distracted you! I’ll just. Get ready in here. Go and start getting yourself warmed up, alright?”

With the sound of shuffling coming from her room, Yaz closed the bathroom door and took the pyjamas in her arms. Dropping them into the seat of the toilet, she heaved a sigh of relief at finally being free of the towel. As much as she did enjoy what had happened, she was not the kind of person to be comfortable in hardly anything at all. At least she had her warm purple plaid nightwear set. Kicking the towel away to the side of the bath, Yaz shimmied her way into the pyjama pants, carefully tying the cord before wrapping herself in the shirt and buttoning the front up. Before she left the bathroom, her eyes drifted back to the mirror and the braid hanging down her back. She was going to have to get the Doctor to teach her how to do it sometime. Not that she had any reason to wear her hair like that normally, but perhaps it would be nice to show off once in a while.

When she opened the door again, Yaz found the Doctor sitting crossed-legged on her bed, one of the books from her shelves sitting in her lap. Her hair had completely curled out now, flying in all directions, and Yaz wondered if the Doctor kept her hair straight for similar reasons to her own. Societal pressure was a pain. Bare feet padded across the carpet, body dropping onto the side of the bed. Yaz looked up at the Doctor with a smile, folding her arms over her stomach before turning to look up at the ceiling. At some point, the Time Lord had insisted they all had some kind of space-like lighting in their rooms. She had tried a more open air feel, but it freaked Graham out and the idea was thusly scrapped. Yaz’s ceiling was painted with various colours of glow in the dark paint, mimicking the twists and spirals of a nebula. It was less bright and bold than she had expected, but it meant it was a lot easier to sleep as a result.

“Why are you reading one of my training manuals, Doctor? I didn’t even take that long to get dressed.”

Lifting her head, the Doctor smiled sheepishly before placing the book on Yaz’s bedside table.

“It’s interesting. Knowing what you do, I mean. Not that I don’t know all about the laws and judiciary systems of countless planets in the universe. It just…gives me a little insight into the world of Yasmin Khan.”

The Doctor came and copied her lying position, turning her head towards Yaz and watching her stare at the ceiling. It had taken her hours to put the mural up there, and the TARDIS had made several attempts to send her off to bed to no avail. By the time Yaz came back to her room after an extended night shift, she found the Doctor flat out on the floor, so far asleep that she never heard her enter. Blobs of paint were scattered across her face and bear arms, and old blouse glowing with various colours under the dim lights. Yaz had gently woken her with a stroke of her hair, urging her to go and get some proper sleep. The day after…she had marvelled at the handiwork.

“Not really that much going on in my world. You know, I mean, aside from you guys. Travelling around the universe, righting wrongs, getting way too much cardio exercise than I ever planned for. But you know what, Doctor?”

Brown eyes met with hazel-green.

“I wouldn’t change it for the world. Not ever.”

That seemed to spur the Doctor on to talking more.

“As much as I say that you can go home, all of you, I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t miss my fam. Because I would. A lot. And…I’m not really sure what I’d do. Not exactly the best at being on my own, don’t like it, it’s made me do some really…never mind. Not gonna go there. It’s too nice a night and I’d rather just spend it talking about anything and everything that isn’t that particular topic. If that’s alright. I mean, I know none of you really…know a lot…and I’m sorry about that. Really. I just never find the time to say things, and even then, how can I pinpoint things from thousands of years’ worth of existence? Better for it just to come out whenever it wants or needs to, you know?”

Yaz understood. In a way. In all her months travelling with the Doctor, the most information that had come out of her was a vague idea of her age and that she had a serious problem with the Daleks. Nothing more than that. Occasionally, life would throw them a bone; someone’s eyes darkening at the mention of her name, or references to a certain point in time. Things would crop up relating to the Doctor, most of which would pass right under their noses. But Yaz knew, she always did. She could see the shift in the Time Lord’s stance, either becoming cocky or recoiling, depending on what was happening around her. She herself would drop the odd hint here and there, of names and people she had one met or helped out. Perhaps another time, she would find out more about her interest.

“Anything and everything is a little broad of a topic, Doctor. I’ll need something more than that to go on if you want to pass the time or get to know me more.”

The Doctor’s face broke out into another wide smile, and the talking began. She would ask simple questions; when her birthday was, her favourite colour, how her childhood was. Yaz found herself opening up rather quickly, drawn in by attentive hazel-green eyes that shone at her responses. She told the Doctor about how her parents were at home, her typical sibling struggles with Sonya. Yaz did love her family, above all else, and a part of her did feel a little guilty for being away so often. Time was moving quicker for her than it was for them, to them…she was just away for an evening. Or a day. Life stayed still without her, which was a terrifying concept to even begin getting to grips with on a Sunday evening.

She talked about her dreams for the future, no matter how vague they were. She wanted to have her own flat one day, somewhere where she could do her own thing. Yaz was quite happy to live on her own, she didn’t crave constant attention or feel the need to have another presence with her. Of course, the fam were excluded. They had their own place in her life she was happy to be around for as long as possible. She hoped that her job standing would improve, and that one day she would rank as a sergeant. Nothing too fancy, nothing that would kill her life. Yaz had come to realised she had lost a lot of it either working too hard or being to scared to grow. The latter came from her school days, which drove the former into existence. To Yaz, it was impossible to be made fun of or bullied if she was too busy doing other things.

When Yaz spoke, her eyes would wander to other parts of the room, and on their return she would see the Doctor’s varying expressions. Sometimes joy, other times hurt or confusion. Her face almost always gave away what she was thinking inside, which often made it easier to deal with harder topics. Sometimes, the Doctor would interject with an anecdote of her own, and Yaz was nothing if not quick to pick up on the fact that she was being told about the Time Lord’s past in kind. She was glad the Doctor felt safe.

“Little Yaz, kicking it about with the boys. How many matches did you say you’d won?”

“At least ten. It was one of the ways I could get them to leave me alone for a bit. They knew I had a really nasty kick, and kept away. Although Ryan got on the receiving end once…teacher’s put him in goal and he kinda got hit in the face…Not exactly the best way to start a friendship but it’s a right laugh to look back on.”

Back in primary school, Ryan and Yaz had been best friends. They looked out for each other, went to each other’s houses, did their homework together on more than one occasion. It had been some of the best times Yaz had had. Although; they had separated pretty quickly when she had reached year four, and the bullying hit its peak. She couldn’t help Ryan anymore, she spent most of her time doing break time activities for the teachers; cleaning brushes, reorganising books, anything to not be in the playground. Anything to be away from Izzy Flint.

“We moved to Park Hill, mom put me in another primary school. Didn’t see Ryan again after that. Izzy ended up going to the same secondary school as me…I think she followed me, but you can’t exactly prove that. In the end I just had to tough it out. Had that awful year and…”

Yaz paused, finding herself at a loss for how to finish her sentence. A hand made its way to resting against her own, cool and comforting, the Doctor’s thumb stroking back and forth over her skin in a soothing pattern. Of course she understood.

“It’s okay. I know what happens next. You’re a wonderful human, Yaz, and nobody can take that away from you.”

The familiar heat began to rise back into her cheeks, prickling down her neck. Yaz had never been one to take compliments, they either flustered her or fed a strange part of her ego, but when the Doctor talked to her like that…it was different. She believed her. Always. Shifting one hand away, Yaz placed it on top of the Time Lord’s and squeezed slightly, smile shining on her face. Sure, the Doctor’s rule was that she lied. But Yaz believed her.

“Thanks. You know just what to say.”

“When you’ve been around as much as I have, awkwardness aside, sometimes it just…comes out. Honestly, you kinda make me wanna be someone…better.”

It was true, the Doctor did want to be better. For her fam. For those she would no doubt one day leave behind. She wanted the best for them, wanted to repair all the damage she had done throughout time and space. Starting with them. Sure, she was on the wrong foot by not telling them about herself, but she would genuinely rectify it one day. Even if she only started with Yaz, giving her little trickles of safe information. There was something inside her, the magnetic pull drawing her towards her companion, that drove her. She had felt it before, knew what the feelings and the thoughts meant, but it was a slow process of getting where she wanted to go. If she wanted to go there at all. Too much of a minefield to navigate. Too little time. Always too little time. The Doctor was at least glad they had gotten some of their feelings out, and managed to finally kiss her. Yasmin Khan, simply irresistible to her in the most basic and beautiful ways.

Turning her head back to the ceiling, the Doctor hummed quietly to herself, keeping up the motions of her thumb despite being held back by Yaz’s other hand. Her eyelids were growing heavier with each passing second, and the world around her was slowly coming out of focus. Head growing fuzzy, she barely heard Yaz yawn, eyes soon closing as she took in the faint vibrations of the TARDIS.

“Doctor?”

With a mumble, the Doctor turned back towards Yaz.

“Maybe it’s time we get you into bed. Come on.”

“Mmm yeah okay.”

Yaz heaved herself upright, holding out an arm to the Doctor for her to do the same. It took a while, her body growing limp from exhaustion, but she eventually made her way to the top of the bed. The covers were flung aside, and soon both of them were wrapped up safely in the warm. Underneath the sheets, Yaz knitted her fingers into her pyjama top, looking over towards the Doctor. She lay on her back, eyes closed, hands balled into the quilt from the underside. Really, she looked adorable, and Yaz banked the image to the back of her mind for later. As she moved to turn over, the Doctor murmured, causing her to look back. Her eyes had opened, looking at her softly.

“S’nice. Thanks for letting me stay Yaz.”

The Doctor let go of the quilt, hands reaching out and nudging Yaz to move closer by her shoulders. Meeting in the middle of the bed, Yaz felt herself being enveloped in a tight hug. She could feel puffs of warm air against her chest, stray hairs tickling her skin through the gaps between buttons. When was the last time the Doctor had hugged her? Properly anyway. It had been a while. Letting her chin rest atop curled blonde hair, Yaz closed her eyes and let herself be lost in the moment. Silence lay sweetly in the room, until it was broken by hushed words. Yaz opened her eyes again, trying to catch what the Doctor was trying to get across.

“Look at the stars…look how they shine for you…”

Was the Doctor…singing to her?

“And everything you do…yeah they were all yellow…”

She was. She was actually singing. For the briefest of moments, she wondered why on earth the Doctor was singing something she knew, but then realised something more important. Her voice. It was soft, smooth, floated around the room effortlessly. The Doctor was hushed by her nightwear, but that didn’t stop Yaz from catching ever annunciation and tone. Her voice was high and beautiful she could feel her heart racing between each sleep-laced word. She drew slow circles against the Doctor’s shoulders, felt her pause in fear, but Yaz continued with an encouraging hum of the tune.

“I came along…I wrote a song for you…”

Yaz couldn’t help herself, her mouth moved on its own, vocal chords flexing as she joined with a whisper.

“And all the things you do…and it was called yellow…”

After a few seconds, the Doctor shuffled away from Yaz, bringing her arms to her chest and staring at her with wide eyes.

“Wait…you can sing?”

“I could say the same to you! Doctor, where did that all come from? Also, since when did you know pop music of all things?”

“I…”

Slowly coming around to the idea that she was safe, the Doctor let herself untense, face softening.

“Dunno. It just sort of happened. I felt like it…felt like I should have done it. I’ve sang before, played a few instruments too, but each body is so different and new and confusing and…I guess I just felt…safe. Ugh, sorry yaz, I’m really being stupid today. Just acting out on impulses all the time. I dunno why. Sorry I keep ruining the night.”

“If you say sorry again, then I’m not above punching your arm you know.”

Yaz reached over the duvet and let her hand rest against the Doctor’s cheek, thumb drawing a line over her cheekbone.

“Doctor, you sounded beautiful, okay?”

Feeling emboldened by their earlier encounter, Yaz tilted her head down and pressed a soft kiss to the Doctor’s forehead. She could feel warmth starting to creep in under her hand and pulled back to see the Time Lord looking off to the side. There was a small hint of a smile on her face, just tugging at the corners of her lips. Settling into her preferred sleeping position – knees up to her chest and arm under the pillow – Yaz closed her eyes and whispered a good night to the Doctor. It was getting harder for her to stay awake, and she put it down to the impromptu singing. Quiet words always got her off to sleep quickly. The Doctor looked over to Yaz, smile widening, before she rolled onto her opposite side and settled down as well.

“Goodnight Yaz…you’re amazing.”

* * *

_ Lips moved down the side of her neck, nipping at her skin, followed by a pleased hum. All she could stand to do was to writhe in place, jostle the weight on top of her, stifle a scream as the same teeth sank harder into her flesh. Hands reached up, leaving red hot claw marks across dark skin, tearing into taught muscles. One hand palmed at her breast, another travelling further south. _

_ _

_ ‘Are you ready for me, Doctor?’ _

_ The Doctor groaned, arching her back off the bed and biting down on her lip. She hadn’t expected this, any of it, but gods she was enjoying every second of it. Yaz...her Yaz... _

With her body jolting awake, the Doctor’s eyes shot open and scanned the room as she slowly sat upright. She wasn’t in her bedroom, wasn’t in any of them even, she was somewhere else. Somewhere…Yaz. She was in Yaz’s bedroom. In Yaz’s bed. With Yaz sleeping soundly beside her. The Doctor turned her head to look at her companion, heaving the quietest sigh she could muster. Sweat clung to her skin, the t-shirt and shorts suddenly feeling much too restrictive for her liking. Of all the time possible for her to dream…it had to be then. Hands raked through knotted blonde hair, teeth biting down on her lower lip to suppress a groan. Perhaps it was time for her to leave for the night, retreat to her own bed, stop giving her brain ammunition to use against her.

Legs moved to the side of the bed, swinging over the edge as the Doctor pressed her feet against the carpet. As she lifted herself up, she heard a noise, turning back to see Yaz stirring. Not as stealthy as she had expected. It took a moment for Yaz to register what was happening, heart rate briefly spiking at the sight of a figure leaving her bed, before soon remembering it was the Doctor.

“Hmmm, Doctor? Where are you going?”

“B-back to my own bed?”

She prayed that Yaz was not going to ask why, and would just let her go quietly, but she was not so lucky. A hand tugged at her wrist, dragging her back into the warmth of the bed. Yaz moved closer, eyes fully open now and beginning to adjust to the darkness. There was worry etched onto the Doctor’s face, and she didn’t like it. Not enough worry to make her worry, nothing bad at least, but enough to pique her curiosity. Letting go of the Time Lord’s wrist, she turned to take hold of her hand instead, lacing their fingers together and gently squeezing.

“Why?”

The Doctor tried to desperately think of anything at all as an excuse. Anything. What sounded plausible? What sounded like something she would say if she could think straight?

“’cause I’m not tired anymore and I didn’t want to wake you?”

Judging by the form on her face, Yaz wasn’t buying it.

“Um…I…”

The police stare was back, again, same as when she was coerced into telling Yaz about the hair washing business. The Doctor hated that look with every fibre of her being, because it always just broke her down without any effort at all. It was not fair in the slightest. Using her free hand to scratch behind her ear, the Doctor mumbled her words more into the pillow.

“I had a dream that woke me up and I didn’t want to disturb you by being awake so I was gonna go back to my room and think about it and let you have a good night’s sleep without me being so all over.”

Finally taking a breath, the Doctor looked back up to Yaz. She was watching her carefully, eyes flicking across the worry lines and half smile she wore. Yaz eventually smiled and shook her head.

“Doctor, you don’t have to leave for that. What’s got you so wound up anyway?”

“It was just a dream, nothing to be c-”

“Was it a bad dream?”

The concern in Yaz’s voice caught her off guard. She had just expected to be left alone.

“N-no…No, it wasn’t a bad dream.”

Yaz furrowed her brows, trying to suss out whatever bits of information she could. The Doctor was clearly flustered while talking, her eyes sometimes falling down to the sheets or up to the ceiling as she spoke. Avoiding eye contact. Her voice quivered slightly as she spoke, words stumbling over her tongue, something that the Doctor never really did. She only rambled. And this was not her usual rambling. Yaz turned her attention briefly to their joined hands, only just picking up on the heat radiating from the Time Lord’s grip and the slightest twitches of her fingers. She was holding something back. Something…

“So, it was a good dream then? Then why were you leaving?"

“Yeah it…it was…but…I…I mean…”

Panic. Confusion. Fear.

Then…her hearts exploding with feeling.

Yaz pushed up against her, their hands crushed between them, lips claiming her own before she could even think to finish her sentence. She had obviously picked up on her internal dilemma, which was mildly concerning. Still, the Doctor was not about to complain so readily. Nudging forward with her nose, she took control away from Yaz and gently guided her onto her back with a swing of her hips. The kiss broke when the Doctor looked down at Yaz and held her in place with knees either side of her hips. Their hands were still interlocked, and the Doctor brought them up to her lips to kiss Yaz’s knuckles again.

“You’re gonna be the death of me…”

“I hope that’s a good thing.”

“You’re playing with fire…you know that?”

“So…burn me.”

Yaz had invited the Doctor to look at her. She had invited her to kiss her. She had invited her into her bed. Her words came off as cocky and self-assured, nothing more than bait for the Time Lord to take, but Yaz was damned if she was about to let an opportunity of having the Doctor right where she wanted her pass her by. No, she was going to take it. Take it and take away everything she had wanted for the past few months. It was a challenge…and it was taken. The Doctor let go of her hand, taking her cheeks in both of them and kissing her with all the fury she had expected only hours earlier in the bath. Fury masked with longing, fury masked with care and consideration, fury of unhaveable kisses and tactical near misses. The Doctor was playing the long game, toying with her, and she loved it.

She finally relented, pouring every part of her hearts into the kiss as she ever-so politely tore through her with her tongue. Yaz let her in, let her take over, let everything and nothing be about the Doctor and the Doctor alone. Part of her wanted to cry from the overwhelm, while the rest was happy to be swept up in a torrent of long burning passion. One hand moved away from her face and stroked down the side of her neck, before grounding itself on the mattress to keep the Time Lord stable. The other swept under her chin and tilted her head up, Yaz finding herself unable to hold back the wanton sigh any longer. Her response seemed to please the Doctor, who twisted things up with quick fire open mouthed kisses before moving to the side of her head.

A fire was burning inside of her, just like she had wanted, hotter than a supernova threatening to consume her in its entirety. The Doctor had done nothing at all yet but kiss her and Yaz swore she was slipping under too quickly. She was addictive, everything about her just made her want to be with her, it always had done. Since the first day they had met. She had tried to hide it, tried to pretend it hadn’t existed, pretend she wasn’t falling at a thousand miles a minute. But she was falling now, hard and fast, and she loved it. Absolutely loved it.

“Oh Yaz, my beautiful Yaz.”

The same singsong voice that she had heard before falling asleep was back, but it was laced with an intoxicating air of superiority and alluring charm. How was such a thing even possible? Yaz felt her hips shift eagerly against the Doctor’s knees, chills running up her spine as the warm words flooded her ears and turned her brain to a hazy mess. The Doctor was calling her beautiful…

“You’re going to find out just how much I’ve thought about this.”

One kiss was pressed to the top of her ear, the Doctor humming with glee as she placed another one underneath, slowly making her way down to Yaz’s jaw. More kisses were ran across the bone, Yaz finding her mouth going slack and all cognitive reasoning leaving her body. Hands shakily snaked their way around the Doctor’s waist and clung to her t-shirt for dear life. Lips ghosted down her neck, brushing over her pulse point before the Time Lord’s nose bumped into the collar of her shirt. With her head buried in the crook of Yaz’s shoulder, the Doctor began to kiss the small patch of exposed skin she found there before making her way back up her neck. Yaz twisted her head to the side and craned her neck, giving over all the access she could as she silently begged for the Doctor’s attention. Teeth grazed, caught briefly, never doing more than teasing. As much as the Doctor wanted to give over everything, she knew she had to be careful. Playing her cards right meant there would be more than enough opportunity for such a thing to happen at a later date.

Showing Yaz what she meant to her meant being vulnerable and open, and the Doctor was still trying to adjust to the idea herself. Being a woman came with so many differences she had yet to truly explore, but emotional comprehension was currently screaming at the forefront. It warred with the side of her that wanted to be hard, be addictive and dark. Soft and gentle crashed into her life so suddenly. Yaz deserved the best side of her and to have everything she wanted. Slender fingers uncurled from her shift and moved up her back to cling to her shoulders, alerting the Doctor that Yaz was silently ready for more. Pulling back to sit on Yaz’s legs, she looked over the buttons standing in her way. Both hands moved to rest against the purple plaid shirt, crossing over Yaz’s stomach. Ever so slowly, she pushed some of the fabric aside and slid underneath to touch burning skin.

Muscles quivered under her touch as she inched her way upwards. The Doctor could feel nails digging into her skin through the fabric, smiling as Yaz broke their eye contact by closing her eyes. She looked lost in concentration as her hands ran over the faint lines of her ribs to pause underneath the swell of her chest. Yaz took in a breath through gritted teeth, still fighting to keep composed. Her façade broke as both of the Time Lord’s hands gently wrapped themselves around her breasts. Her shirt had risen up slightly as the Doctor moved, giving her a near-perfect view of the soft outline of her muscles. It had already set her mind racing back in the bath room, but now she had a wonderfully uninterrupted view. Hands moved slowly, testing the waters and the feel of Yaz under her fingers. Yaz’s hips twisted underneath her again, so she moved her head down so her nose brushed against Yaz’s and she could take in her muted whines and sighs as she worked. Her senses set alight every time, heat flooding her body as her hands shifted enough to give her thumbs access to draw circles around slowly hardening nipples.

“Hhh, Doctor…”

“Yes?”

Yaz opened her eyes to see the Doctor looking at her with her lower lip caught between her teeth. She groaned and arched her back into the Time Lord’s touch, her own hands dropping to the mattress and curling into it. With the smouldering stare, it was hard for her to form words, so Yaz gestured with her chin towards her shirt and prayed that the Doctor got the idea. Her hands stilled, head falling to the side and strands of blonde hair partially covering one eye. She looked down to the buttons again, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, okay. Why didn’t you say that’s what you wanted. Cat got your tongue?”

“Shut up, you’re enjoying this too much.”

“Maybe a little bit.”

Yaz rolled her eyes as the Doctor winked at her before removing her hands from underneath her shirt. She took her time in carefully undoing the buttons, starting from the bottom and gradually making her way higher. It was simply another game of tension building, and Yaz had half a mind just to swat the Doctor’s hands away and get the job done herself. It would be much quicker that way. She was taking too long and it was driving her mad. When the Doctor reached the final button and flicked it away with a twist of her wrist, she captured Yaz’s mouth again and slowly prized the shirt away from her torso. She let out a surprised whine when she felt her weight being shifted as Yaz pushed herself upright. With the Doctor’s arms going to loop around her neck, she shrugged the shirt from her shoulders and arms, letting it fall behind her. As she tried to push back against the kisses and wrangle some semblance on control back, Yaz found herself swiftly hitting the mattress again as teeth tugged her lip and the Doctor tutted at her.

Her lips moved down the opposite side of her jaw and swept to the front of her throat, revelling in the vibrations of Yaz’s low groan. Kisses decorated her shoulders, her clavicles, anywhere and everywhere the Time Lord could reach. Yaz, desperately wanting to touch the Doctor in kind, slid her hands underneath the pillows and clung to them, arching again as she felt a tongue tasting the skin in between her breasts. With a teasing nip, the Doctor shuffled further down Yaz’s body until her hands were holding her up either side of her ribs. Her head ducked down and a dark nipple was taken into her mouth. As the Doctor so lovingly and devilishly lavished attention on her with her tongue, Yaz dragged one hand back out to thread into blonde hair and keep her head in place as she worked.

“Oh god…Doctor…I…s-so good.”

In her very few and far between encounters, none of them ever being particularly long-lasting or intimate, Yaz had never found herself to be any kind of talker. Or verbal encourager. At best she would breathe and maybe whine a little, but nothing more. Nothing had ever elicited a vocal response from her. Personal exploration had always been a quiet affair as well. Then the Doctor came in, all swagger and skill, and she found herself unable to hold anything back at all. She wanted nothing more than to tell her how good she was, praise her very bones and the air she breathed and the god damn way she could figure out all of her quirks in a matter of milliseconds. So, she did. Her praises garnered faster movement, one hand coming to grope and squeeze at her neglected breast as her thumb ran over her nipple, heady moans sounding into her skin as she pulled just a little too enthusiastically at the Doctor’s hair when she nibbled her.

“D-don’t stop…don’t you dare stop…”

With an exaggerated and deliberate pop of her lips, the Doctor swapped sides, moving dangerously slow across Yaz’s chest to take the other nipple into her mouth. Her rhythm and pace was the same, but with more gentle nips of her teeth as her finger and thumb were used to roll her other nipple in tandem. With the added pressure on her hips and thighs, Yaz found it impossible to squirm and struggle, growing increasingly frustrated as the familiar throbbing sensation began to stir between her legs. She wanted to sue her free hand and reach down, pass between the Doctor’s own legs and deal with the problem herself. But it was impossible. Playing with fire was backfiring hard. The Doctor was enjoying herself far too much, as she continued to make pleased sounds against her. How could one person go from sounding like an angel, to carnal and obscene, in such a short space of time?

Airing her frustration with a long whine, Yaz gave the hardest jostle of her lower body she could, rocking the Doctor ever so slightly and causing her to release her hold on her breasts. She looked down at her with a brief flash of confusion, before smirking. Yaz let the hand in her hair move down to the front of her star print shirt, tugging slightly.

“No fair. At least take this off.”

“On one condition.”

Yaz lifted her head off the pillow slightly, half intrigued and half fearful of what was going to be said condition.

“Say please.”

On all accounts, that was not exactly what Yaz had been picturing as the condition. If anything, her mind had latched onto the possibility of no touching. Asking? Saying please? That was…the Doctor wanted her to be submissive. She wanted to take the last bit of control away from her. Yaz was prideful, it was possibly the only sin she had ever even considered it being possible to commit, which meant that going with the ask was somehow incredibly difficult. She bit down on her tongue, eyes turning to the side. The Doctor took her hand and tugged it away from her shirt, holding it above Yaz’s head as she looked down at her with glee in her eyes.

“Say it.”

“No.”

Yaz turned to look back at the Doctor, holding her stare. She was not going to be on the verge of begging. Not under any…

“Fine.”

Her hand dropped to the pillows, the Doctor swiftly disengaging from the moment and turning her body towards the door. It took all of a second before Yaz was sat upright with panic in her eyes.

“W-wait!”

Her outcry earned a turn of the Doctor’s head, and a raised eyebrow. Yaz swallowed her pride, closed her eyes, focused on the overwhelming need to have the Time Lord just finish what she started and take her.

“Please…please take it off, Doctor.”

There was a pause, one Yaz hated every second of, before the Doctor reached around to the bottom of her shirt and swept it over her head in one motion. Tossing it to the floor, she made her way back over the bed and trapped Yaz in place again. When her body finally came into contact with her own, Yaz swore that the universe stopped for a second. The Doctor had purposefully slid up against her, using the friction of skin on skin to make her groan in relief. Her coolness was brilliant against her raised temperature, and when the Time Lord’s hands began to wander up and down her sides, Yaz was compelled to kiss her. The Doctor remained recessive for once, allowing Yaz to slip past her defences and get her first taste of the inner workings of her. It didn’t take long for her to be pressed back into the pillow and for the Doctor to break the kiss by trailing them down to her stomach instead.

Yaz looked down and watched as the Doctor moved, fingers curling into the pillows again as she put the bodily sensations into visual context. She could feel the gentle push of the Doctor’s breasts against her skin, and desperately wanted to reach out and to just touch her in kind. There had been nothing against that, nothing to say she wasn’t allowed, but Yaz was selfishly enjoying things too much. She would get her chance with the Doctor, oh she would make sure of that.

With the sights becoming too much again, she closed her eyes and let her hips canter again and beg for the Doctor to keep moving lower and lower. Hands mapped out the muscles of her stomach, the shape of her waist and how her hips gently curved outwards. Soon, fingertips came into contact with the thick elastic waistband of her trousers, the Doctor lifting her head briefly to see Yaz’s face straining with want.

As much as she was enjoying herself, the Doctor began to worry. Was she going to fast? Too far? Was this something that Yaz actually wanted, or was she just as lost in the moment as she was? Her hearts were already working overtime, but adding anxious thinking into the mix was proving lethal. With a few taps of her fingers against Yaz’s hip bone, she garnered her companion’s attention.

“Is this…am I…are you okay with this?”

The husk of the Doctor’s voice had gone, replaced with her trademark concern and silent need for reinforcement. Yaz looked down at her briefly, trying her best to smile but finding it difficult under the circumstances.

“Yes. More than okay. Are you?”

“Y-yeah. I just…wanted to make sure that this was something you wanted. Just, say it again for me?”

Yaz groaned, mentally cursing.

“Please, Doctor, for the love of everything in the universe, if you don’t do something in the next few seconds I am going to physically restrain you and prove that I want this more than anything right now. Alright?”

They shared a smile, both trying to hide the beginnings of a fit of giggles at just how absurd of a situation they found themselves in. Yaz admired the Doctor’s constant need for a check in of how someone else felt, and the Doctor was more than glad that Yaz could always quell her fears with humour. Kissing her hip bone, the Doctor let her hands slide down Yaz’s legs, watching as she lay back down and breathed a contented sigh. She could feel the little shudders and quakes under her hands, revelling in the reactions she drew out. The Doctor took hold of the top of Yaz’s trousers and slowly began to slide them downwards. She kissed her way down one leg, cheekily nipping in places as she reached mid-calf and threw the garment off the edge of the bed. She made her way back up the opposite leg, lingering around the inner side of Yaz’s thigh whilst holding her hips down into the bed.

At this point, the Doctor had to admit she was a little unsure of how to go about things. History aside. Her body was already reacting entirely different to what she was used to, leaving her mind lost in a foggy mess. She worked her way through it, settling on the most simple option. Simple was always best, at least in these circumstances, no need to over complicate matters and set herself up for an embarrassing fall of sorts. Moving back up to the top of the bed, she lay alongside Yaz and stroked the side of her face softly. Her other hand lay still against her stomach, biding time. When Yaz opened her eyes and turned towards the Doctor’ her hands moved to rest atop the lace trim of her underwear. Fingers slowly made their way underneath the fabric and drew lines between her hip bones, leaving Yaz to buck upwards and plead with her eyes for more.

The Doctor all but happily complied.

She moved downwards, brushing over short hairs and across the line of Yaz’s leg. She watched her eyes close again, mouth dropping, hips shuddering as they wanted to move towards her touch. She pushed the fabric of Yaz’s underwear away from her skin, avoiding the warmest parts of her, to repeat her motions on the other side of her body. The Doctor repeated the process twice, just enough for Yaz to finally move up and guide her into the right position. Her fingers were instantly met with warmth, middle finger easily sliding through slick heat to reach Yaz’s centre.

“O-oh…oh god…oh god…”

“Hmm, not quite. But to you, maybe. I’ll take that.”

At the first movement up, both the Doctor and Yaz groaned. The restriction that the underwear provided was equal parts awkward and sensation heightening. The Doctor felt so close to Yaz, took in every part of her as she gathered up her arousal and made first contact with her already swollen clit. If anything, she was genuinely surprised at how worked up Yaz already was. Perhaps it really had been too long a time coming. Whatever the reason, the Time Lord was determined to make the most of the experience and give everything to make Yaz happy. She gently moved her middle finger up and down over her clit, ghosting just enough to draw out soft whimpers. Swapping for her index finger instead, the Doctor turned Yaz’s head back towards her so she could kiss her. It was slower and more intimate, softer. Yaz would moan in between the kisses, keeping her mouth open and waiting as the Doctor brought her middle finger back and gradually increased her pressure and pace.

“A-ah…”

There was a certain way the Doctor moved her fingers that had Yaz’s back arching off the bed, and she felt the faint hum of a laugh against her lips. She shut the Time Lord up with a harder kiss, pulling her closer from the back of her shoulders and pressing their bodies together again. The Doctor was still going much too slow for her liking, and yet Yaz could still feel the sensations building and burning her up inside. Biting down on the Doctor’s lip, she let out a groan and thought everything about how she wanted more from her. When she let go, they parted briefly, just long enough for Yaz to mutter a please under her breath. She needed to be less restricted, to give the Doctor better access, to be able to see her fingers working her over towards the edge. The mental image alone caused her to shudder with anticipation.

The Doctor let go of the side of her face, sliding her hand out from Yaz’s underwear until she caught hold of them. She moved down the bed enough to push them down, Yaz lifting her legs and kicking them away the second she had the chance to. Her knees were pushed apart, the Doctor’s still wet fingers marking up her thighs until she returned to slide through the source. She paused, idly ghosting back around Yaz’s clit with feather-light touches, purposefully pulling out whatever moans and whines she could.

“Tell me how you want it, Yaz.”

Whether or not the innocently questioning statement was meant to come across as the hottest thing Yaz had ever heard, she had no idea, but it was. So much so that she swore her brain shorted out. Finding the ability to answer her was hard, the hardest thing ever when coupled with her body still buzzing on a high. With short and shallow breaths, Yaz just about found her voice after a few seconds of mentally fumbling around in the dark. She knew her own body, knew what she wanted, and the Doctor wanted to know as well. Yaz trusted her, her skill, her love.

“I…harder. Please. Kiss me.”

Two fingers slid through her again and returned to set an entirely new rhythm against her clit, driving Yaz to gasp before being cut off by the Doctor’s lips again. She felt weight leaning against her, breasts pushing together as the Doctor swallowed every sound she made and wound her up beautifully. One leg swung over her, adding even more pressure to the hand between her legs. Yaz felt her heart hammering against her chest, breathing becoming near impossible as her body started to quake and shudder. She was drawing so close so fast. All it took for her to tumble over the edge finally was for the Doctor to slide her fingers into her hair and tilt her head back so her tongue could work its way freely into her mouth. Hips bucked off the bed as her muscles tensed up, moaning into the Doctor, completely losing the sensation of fingers gradually slowing their pace and drawing out every single second of her climax. Yaz soon dropped back down onto the bed, body rolling slightly so she was back on her back, parting from the Doctor. The Time Lord unhooked her leg and carefully withdrew her hand, mindful of the brush of her fingers causing Yaz to recoil from over-sensitivity.

Taking her hand out of her hair, the Doctor moved to cup Yaz’s cheek again and kiss the other one, wiping her fingers against the underside of the quilt and watching as Yaz slowly came down from her high. The tension in her face melted away, replaced with a loose smile as her eyes eventually opened and turned towards her. Even in the dark, the Doctor could see the flush of her skin and how far her pupils had dilated. Never in her wildest dreams had she thought that such a thing would have happened, never imagined that she would be so close to Yaz, it was…

“You alright, Doctor?”

Apparently, she had zoned out, Yaz having turned back onto her side and tapping her gently on the nose to bring her attention back. She nodded, one hand idly running up and down Yaz’s arm as she smiled. Goosebumps formed underneath her touch.

“Yeah, just…I was just thinking.”

“About this?”

“Kinda…Just…never thought any of this would happen. Still not quite used to how I’m feeling either. Body’s all alive and burning and on edge. Wondering how my hearts haven’t given out too. What’re you doing to me, Yasmin Khan?”

Yaz leant forward and kissed the Doctor’s forehead, placing one hand over the one on her arm and halting its movement. Sure, she had never thought it would happen either, but she had enjoyed every second of it, and was going to show the Doctor just that. She pressed a kiss to the bridge of the Time Lord’s nose, the tip, moving to her cheek before finally catching her lips. Yaz could feel the smile and hear the hum of amusement. They were lost in their own little world, safe in her bed, acting like lovesick teenagers frolicking around without a care. Yaz found herself kissing the Doctor in short burst, drawing out little tunes of melodic laughter as she went. Soon enough, both hands moved to push her back so the Time Lord could breathe and laugh in her own space. It set Yaz off in kind, having to wipe a stray tear from her eye.

They took a moment to calm down, get back to quiet serenity, hands interlocking together again as they lay in silence. Despite how things normally played out, Yaz found herself much more awake. Her usual routine had left her falling asleep after any kind of climax, but in that moment she was still buzzing. She could feel the same nervous energy still radiating from the Doctor, bubbling away intensely under the surface. It was raw and human, and entirely hers to take note of and be enraptured by.

Yaz tilted her hand so that her thumb could find her pulse point, timing the rapid fluttering of the beats of her heart. There was still warmth and a single bead of sweat on her skin, and Yaz could feel herself working up again. She still wanted to give back to the Doctor, show off what she could do for her in kind.

“I dunno, but I’ll keep doing it, if you want me to.”

As she took her hand away, she manoeuvred her way to sit on top of the Doctor’s hips, lifting a hand to move several strands of blonde hair away from the Doctor’s eyes. Fingers trailed down the side of her jaw, feeling it tense as she paused and let her words linger in the air.

“Please.”

The words were quieter than a whisper, just enough for Yaz to hear, but it was all the confirmation she needed. She leant down and pushed herself into the Doctor. Her lips were fire, addictive and raw, and the Doctor swore they were the best thing in the universe. They were perfectly human - slightly chapped, but perfect to her - and they made her lose all control. The kiss became heated and deeper much quicker than she had done before, soon leaving her mouth and travelling up her jaw and down her neck. Yaz drew a line upwards with her tongue, turning to nip at the Doctor’s lobe. When she heard a low moan, a switch flicked inside her brain. Teeth travelled back down, taking hold of the Doctor’s neck and gently applying pressure there. She felt the Doctor tense, heard her gasp turn into a moan of more, and Yaz sank down and set to work. With a teasing tug and a wash of her tongue, she pulled away again, resolving to do it again lower down. The Doctor encouraged her with both hands resting around her own neck and keeping her in place as she turned her head for better access. Yaz had not considered the Doctor to be so vulnerable so quickly. She hummed in pleasure against her skin, kissing down her shoulders, nudging her arms away so she could move to her collarbones.

Her journey south was spurred on by eager hands coercing her path. Yaz resisted, of course, nipping and kissing her way across the Doctor’s upper chest before sweeping down the side of her right breast. She marvelled at how sensitive the skin was there, delighting in the high pitched whine and nails digging into the back of her neck. Leaving slow, languid kisses against the noteworthy spot, Yaz eventually shifted upwards along the Doctor’s sternum. She mapped each kiss in her head, counting out how many it took before she reached the Time Lord’s lips again, one hand sliding up her side until it cupped one of her breasts. As Yaz kissed her again, she began to squeeze and map out the shape of the Doctor. By all accounts, she assumed them the same size, although there was a different kind of fullness that the Time Lord possessed over her. She ran a thumb over her nipple, humming into the kiss as she felt it rise at her touch.

Overall, the Doctor was quite sensitive, and Yaz was finding her body being moved her and there every few seconds. It had never occurred to her how strong the Time Lord really was, but she was soon finding out. In order to move things along and hopefully keep her stiller, Yaz broke the kiss and moved her lips to encapsulate the Doctor’s other nipple. It took two strokes of her tongue before it stiffened like the other. She could hear faster and louder breathing, moans bitten back behind clenched teeth, felt the Doctor arching into her. Yaz swore she could listen to her sounds all night.

“Harder…”

Fingers shifted to the back of her head, unable to get any purchase thanks to the tight braid, clamouring for more. Yaz swapped sides, making sure to squeeze a little harder and add a pinch or twist here and there.

“Oh…yes…like that…aaaah.”

From her current position, Yaz took the opportunity to slide one of her legs in between the Doctor’s thighs, using her knee to add the slightest amount of pressure against her. The result was near instantaneous, the Doctor’s back arching and hips keening.

“T-that’s…new.”

The Doctor found her hips moving of their own accord, grinding down on Yaz’s thigh as she continued to suck and squeeze at her breasts. There were so many new sensations flaring to life, too many to concentrate on, all lighting her senses up like a symphony of pleasure. She could feel her legs sliding against Yaz’s own, her tongue and teeth and fingers on her skin, shivers rolling across her body like harsh waves. The Doctor could feel something burning away inside her, a tightness starting to form somewhere below her stomach. It was all much too hard to describe, but she was beginning to realise that the shorts covering her were becoming much too irritating and restrictive. They needed to go, and fast. Moving her hands out of Yaz’s hair and around to the front of her shoulders, she used what little strength she had to push at her companion, eyes following her as she relinquished her hold with a questioning gaze. Yaz was not expecting to catch a vague sight of the Doctor’s mouth hanging open.

“I need…these off.”

Rolling her hips for emphasis, and accidentally sending another shock through her system, the Doctor whined.

“They’re in the way and really uncomfortable suddenly and I think I’m starting to get an idea of what-”

Words stopped as Yaz placed two fingers under the Doctor’s chin and lifted her jaw up, closing her mouth. Shifting them slightly to place them on her lips instead, Yaz just gave a short nod before removing her hand from the Time Lord’s jaw. She moved her leg away, making her way to the other side of the bed before turning her attention to the plaid patterned shorts. Yaz had originally had them as trousers, but after they had suddenly decided to rip at the knees, she had re-sewn them into shorts. Dark blue and periwinkle were a good colour combination on the Doctor. Gliding her hands across the Time lord’s stomach and down her sides, she took hold of the waistband and began to pull the shorts down. Once they were past the Doctor’s ankles, she threw them to one side before returning to her previous position. She slowly guided her thigh into position, holding on to the Doctor’s hips and urging her to go back to grinding against her. There was heat pooling between her legs, burning a spot against Yaz, not to mention the hint of wetness she could already feel through tight fitting boxers.

The Doctor was stuck between two worlds – frustration and pleasure – working her way through both of them with Yaz’s encouragement. The knot in her body was growing tighter, seemingly never leading to anything at all. She had never thought to tell Yaz that she had never done anything like this before in her current regeneration, and was hoping her earlier start to a ramble would have gotten the idea across. There had been times when she had contemplated it, nights driven mad with curiosity or dreams keeping her awake, but nothing had ever come of it. Fear, confusion, or just anxiety…all of those feelings had gotten in the way. And yet, there was Yaz, somehow able to draw out all of her weaknesses and give her an experience she hadn’t even begun to scratch the surface of. She needed more of it.

“Yaaaz…please…please just touch me.”

Nothing like being direct. Yaz found she was a little taken aback, halting the Doctor’s movements with a sure grip. However, it wasn’t enough to put her off her game, and certainly not enough to distract her.

“Of course, you’ve been so good waiting already.”

Moaning in response, moving a clenched fist to her mouth to stifle the noise, the Doctor let Yaz do as she desired. Yaz moved her leg away, hands still holding still, lowering the Doctor’s hips back down onto the bed. Fingers drew shapes over her hip bones, sweeping around to take the slyest of feels of the Time lord’s backside, before feeling her way down her thighs to part them further. Her fingers followed the puckered dips and lines of her skin, a smile forming on her face. To her, the Doctor was perfect, even more-so now that she found such human imperfections. She felt tangible, sensational, and Yaz half regretted not doing things in light. But then, that left more opportunity for nerves, and she felt safe in the comfort of darkness and bedsheets. When she reached the lowest seam of the Doctor’s boxers, she pushed her hands underneath and continued her path until she was met with the juncture of her thighs. The Doctor’s hips keened off the bed again, expecting to finally be touched, but it never came. Instead, Yaz withdrew, copying the motion against the topside of the fabric, leaving the Doctor squirming.

“Uuhn, Yaz…this isn’t what I-”

“Shhh. Be patient.”

Resting one hand against the Doctor’s hip bone, Yaz moved her free hand to the two tiny buttons on the front of her boxers. Fingers idly toyed with them briefly, just enough to earn another moan, before ghosting further down. When she finally came into contact with the source of the wet heat, Yaz watched the Doctor’s head push further into the pillows as she sighed with relief. As she moved back up, Yaz applied a little pressure to her fingers, just enough to catch a familiar bump in her path. The Doctor groaned through gritted teeth as her hands scrambled to cling to the mattress underneath her. Everything was too hot, too uncomfortable, too…cool. She could feel the cool air against her skin. Yaz was peeling her boxers away from her, giving her a reprieve. The Doctor kicked the garment away without any care, just glad to finally be able to stretch her legs out and feel the room around her. Anything to distract from the pulsing and burning and wetness clinging to every part of her.

Yaz was once again amused at the Doctor’s enthusiasm. She hooked herself over one of her legs, moving to sit in between them. There was so much she wanted to do, things she wanted to explore and discover, but the anxious thoughts of her inexperience were haunting her. With one hand balling into her own lap, Yaz positioned the other against the Doctor’s pubic bone. Short hairs tickled the palm of her hand, the heel just leaving enough pressure to draw out another whine. When Yaz pulled away, her index finger lined up with the Doctor’s centre, ever so slowly and finally pushing its way into slick heat. The reaction she drew was instantaneous; a sharp buck of hips, a high moan, and Yaz forgoing any sense of doubt. All she needed was to encourage the Doctor to keep parlaying bits of information to her. As her finger pressed against the small bump, Yaz spoke out. The Doctor swore she had never heard such a silken voice.

“Do you want me to keep touching you like this?”

She drew delicate and slow circles around the Doctor’s clit, unable to stop a smile as the sounds she elicited. They were music to her ears, pure unfiltered music.

“Oh stars…please…don’t stop. Keep doing t-that…”

Yaz added a little more pressure to her movements, alternating every few strokes, watching and listening and waiting. She could feel the Doctor’s legs shaking, her breathing getting ever more frantic. It was beautiful. She was beautiful. Yaz was lost in a daze of sounds and sights, adding her middle finger into play, keeping up the contrasts in her touch. The Doctor was burning up, unable to think, desperately searching for something to heighten things further. She needed it. Oh, stars, she needed it.

“Y-Yaz, Yaz, Yaz, Yaz…”

The name rolled off her tongue like a mantra, a prayer, openly desiring more and more. With her hand otherwise occupied, Yaz dipped her head down and lay slow kisses to the Doctor’s thighs. The gasp she received was higher than any of the others, and she could feel hips moving in time to her motions.

“What do you need, Doctor?”

“I…I…”

Leaving her last kiss just shy of crossing into the path of her fingers, Yaz let her head rest against the Doctor’s thigh as she mumbled into her skin, breathing warm air between her legs.

“Tell me.”

With a resounding moan, the Doctor inched a shaking hand closer towards the back of Yaz’s head. When she made contact, a swathe of mental images flooded her own mind, words catching in her throat in the process. There was a slip in her control, a slip of her grip on her own consciousness, small trickles of thought passing through into Yaz’s head. She did not recoil, merely gasped, struggling to comprehend what she had just experienced. She knew that the TARDIS had some kind of psychic link – telepathy – but such a thing had never crossed her mind at being possible for the Doctor too.

“Sorry…I’m sorry, Yaz. I…just…I…aaaaah!”

Arching off the bed, the Doctor just about managed to open her eyes long enough to see Yaz leaving a kiss where her fingers had once been.

“All you had to do was ask, Doctor.”

Yaz was veering into new an unfamiliar territory, and yet with the hand behind her head, it felt so natural to her. She drew a slow line with her tongue through the Doctor’s folds, gathering her up, taking her in. It was like nothing she was ever likely to experience again. The Doctor tried hard to not move, to stay still and let Yaz learn everything there was to know about her. But she couldn’t stop herself. Her hips keened, moving up and down in time with the slow languid laps of Yaz’s tongue against her clit. The bubbling and burning she had once felt had exploded into a blazing inferno, sweat building on her brow as she could do nothing more than moan with wild abandon. Yaz held onto the Doctor’s thighs, slighting back to cup her backside and lift her just away from the bed to get better access to where she needed to be. She swapped to faster strokes, flicking the tip of her tongue and listening for aural cues. Much like her discovery with the underside of the Doctor’s breasts, she found out just where she was most sensitive and how she liked her to move.

The Doctor was climbing, harder and faster than she ever had done before. Oh, her knowledge extended to what it was like to be with a woman, but being on the receiving end was more than she ever could have imagined. She could hear each and every lap against her clit and the sounds of her arousal, she could feel everything deep within her bones and through every nerve she had. Every sensation was building her higher and higher, body tensing up like a spring, back arching off the bed. She was so close, teetering over the edge of something earth shattering. As Yaz twisted her tongue, lips closing in around her clit and applying a second layer of pressure around her, her voice broke into a soundless cry. The tension inside her snapped, pulling her down under wave after wave of euphoria. With the force of her hips jolting, Yaz pulled back slightly, just enough to mind her teeth from colliding anywhere.

She slowed to short laps again, feeling fingers going slack against her head and drop down to her shoulder. As the Doctor came down, Yaz left a final kiss against her centre, smirking at the little shudders of her muscles, before making her way back up to the top of the bed. She held out her arms and pulled the Doctor in close, cradling her head against her chest and shushing her quickly, the Time Lord’s body still shuddering every once in a while. With soothing circles between her shoulders, the Doctor eventually opened her eyes again and looked up at Yaz. Her body bordered on numb and awash with strange tingles, meaning it took several attempts for her to move back enough to smile at her.

“Yaz…”

Yaz placed a finger against her lips, taking the time to settle them both back into the bed, drawing the covers over their naked bodies. The Doctor dropped a hand over her waist and snuggled up as close as she could get. Pressing a kiss to her forehead, Yaz stroked her hand through matted blonde hair, heaving a sigh. Waking up in the middle of the night to the Doctor leaving…had not ended how she had expected it to. Not that she was complaining. However, it had left her considerably more exhausted than when she had first stirred. Hiding a yawn in the Doctor’s hair, she heard the faintest of laughs.

“Go back to sleep. We can stay in as long as you want tomorrow, okay?”

Yaz grumbled, fighting with her consciousness to stay awake. But it was a losing battle, and she relented with a sigh.

“Mmm ‘kay. Night Doctor.”

“Sleep well, my beautiful Yaz.”

* * *

When Yaz awoke, bleary eyed and confused, she heard the faint sounds of breathing besides her. Rolling over into her side, she saw a mass of milky white skin before her. For a moment, she was lost, before noticing wavy blonde hair and hearing a faint murmur. It was the Doctor. Sound asleep. Memories broke through her morning haze, leaving her flushing. She had kissed the Doctor. She had…they had…Yaz pushed the thoughts away as she watched the Time Lord roll over onto her back. Tentatively, she tucked some hair behind her ear, causing her to stir. The Doctor muttered again, more unintelligible words, before her eyes slowly opened and looked around the room. It took all of a few seconds until a dopey smile appeared on her face and a hand came from under the covers to hold onto Yaz’s own.

“G’morning. How did you sleep?”

Yaz offered a smile back, slowly moving her thumb underneath the Doctor’s jaw. She felt it flex under her touch, vibrating with a pleased hum. Yaz was slowly beginning to love all the tiny little moments she witnessed, all the little quirks of the Doctor.

“Really good actually, what about you?”

“Honestly?”

Yaz nodded.

“Best rest I think I’ve had this lifetime. Guess I should stay here more often.”

A pause quickly lay between them, the Doctor’s eyes widening at the realisation of what she said. She rolled over onto her side, staring at Yaz, fearful of what was to come. All Yaz did was raise an eyebrow and continue to smile, confusing her even more than when she had awoken in a new place. A new room. A new bed.

“Are you implying something, Doctor?”

The Doctor’s cheeks began to colour a healthy pink, eyes falling down to the duvet as she briefly chewed on her bottom lip. Of course she slipped up, she always slipped up, the awkwardness never truly left her alone. And yet, Yaz wasn’t kicking her out. She wasn’t shouting. She was just…being Yaz. It gave her hope. Hope that maybe there was genuinely something there between them, that she was more than willing to take the risk on.

“I…um…maybe? I mean, we can just…um…leave things as they are or…”

Words were failing her, stumbling over her tongue. She needed help, fast. Help that Yaz was more than happy to provide. She leant forward and placed a gentle kiss to the Doctor’s lips, lingering briefly and delighting in the reaction she received; a quiet sigh and eyes slowly fluttering closed. Yaz muttered her words against the Doctor’s skin, unable to stop a smile forming.

“If it’s alright with you…I kind of like this. I wasn’t lying when I said I’d thought about this a lot, Doctor. If you want to be here, and you’ll have me, then I’ll have you too.”

When the Doctor opened her eyes again, she was beaming from ear to ear, tears brimming. Without warning, Yaz found herself swept up in a bone crushing hug, the Doctor laughing softly in her ear as she nestled herself in the crook of her shoulder.

“Yasmin Khan, I’d like to have you for as long as time allows.”

The two of them settled back into the bed, once the Doctor had finally let Yaz go and given her room to breathe again. All Yaz needed was just to lay there with the Doctor, without a care in the world. However, she was getting a little uncomfortable. Their cuddling was only cut short when Yaz moved away and took the hair band out of the bottom of her braid. Threading her fingers through her hair, the Doctor watched on in sheer awe as curl after curl cascaded down Yaz’s shoulders and across her chest. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen, and the Doctor swore she was going to tell Yaz that every single day, for the rest of their time together. But, to her, time had stopped still and there was no rush. She had Yaz, in her arms, and there would be plenty of time to tell her all the things she loved about her. All the things she had kept secret for months. All the time in the world.

**Author's Note:**

> If you made it this far, congratulations!  
Seriously, that's mad impressive.
> 
> Anyway the joke is done now, yell at me please on:  
@TheRainbowFox13 - Twitter / @the-rainbow-fox-13 - Tumblr


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